I grew up in the 60’s and wanted to be a career woman. I wanted to be Mary Richards from the Mary Tyler Moore show. When I looked at the stay at home moms in my neighborhood, I looked down on them. They dressed frumpy, didn’t wear makeup, were boring,…My mother in law was the worst of all. She did NOTHING to help her husband financially. All she cared about was a clean house. Even the kids were secondary to maintaining her Suzy Homemaker image.
Then I had my first child. I tried to have it all career and family. I was able to DO it. But my heart was no longer in it. I realized that I had been lied to all my life by the feminists. Why couldn’t women be women? Why did we have to act like we were men?
The maternal part of me wanted to stay at home. Finally, I put my career on hold and worked only part time (every other weekend) in a job lower in status. Instantly, our family life was so much better! The only thing hard about it was money of course.
But we have our whole lives to work, especially if Social Security goes bankrupt. So what does it hurt to drop out of the job market for a several years?
It makes me sad now, because when women get pregnant they are no longer asked “Are you going to keep working or be a stay at home mom?” Instead they are asked “How long are you going to take for your maternity leave?” There seems to be no reflection or choice anymore.
So I too have changed my attitude from my life experience.
It makes me think of Mother Angelica. When she was a child, hated the nuns. And here she ended up a nun. She said to be careful what you tell God what you are not going to do. Because that’s what He’ll have you doing. The same was true for me. And guess what? He really does know best. I couldn’t be happier.
But because of our utilitarian society, sometimes I feel guilty being at home.