Everyone is afraid of how their peers will perceive them, you should not be ashamed of considering yourself in the light of your peers, that is to some extent a natural instinct, however we are called not to think of our ‘self’.
I went through this dilemma and have and still do receive some odd looks and comments about saying grace and making the Sign of the Cross at meal times when I am eating out at friends homes, family homes or restaurants, but after a period of struggle with it I decided that the fact remains and that I stick to is…
This is my faith, I do not make anyone else come to my faith, they are free to do as they wish, therefore so am I free to do as I wish and I wish to serve God in His Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church, that being the case, if anyone would comment or ridicule me, they are rude and ignorant, I will pray for them and not worry about any ridicule or comments I receive, it is not I that they ridicule, it is Christ Jesus and for that I am sad, but for the bearing of the ridicule I am glad, it is a blessing and should I serve the Lord until death, He will reward the calm endurance of ridicule and hatred in His Name…‘Those who acknowledge Me before men, I will acknowledge before My Father’ (paraphrased)
I can tell you, I sometimes feel small and belittled inside, but what does it matter how I feel about this? All that matters is Jesus.
Then again you may be surprised that someone may say ‘Amen’ when they think you have finished saying your grace as once happened to me.
Don’t be ashamed of yourself for this, go on forward again and do as your heart is convicted to do by the Holy Spirit. Look at St Peter, look at the great Saint he went on to be, please don’t persecute yourself with this, but turn around and do as the Holy Spirit is telling you to do…become the great Saint also! You are not shallow nor are you not a good Christian, this is the journey in faith friend and it’s a tough long hard road, Jesus is right with you, don’t be afraid.
God Bless you and much love and peace to you