Asking for help to share the truth about IVF with gentleness and love


I knew a couple in my parish who, having been married for 5 years,
haven't been "successful" in conceiving a child.

They also tried IVF twice to no avail. The wife shared that they're
going for their 3rd try around January.

I'm aware that IVF is bad (separates the procreative aspect from the
unity aspect of the nuptial union of spouses, often involves letting
"disqualified embryos" die).

I don't think the couple are aware of the horrible "side effects" of IVF.

I feel that I should share the truth, but I'm having trouble doing so
in "gentleness and love".

After a novena and many research, I stumbled upon

I sent the link to them, and somehow pestered them to watch it. I feel
that I should wait until they watched the video before I shared a bit

My questions:

*]Have anyone ever had experience sharing this info to others?
*]We'll meet during Christmas in one of the masses.
*]Is this a good venue to talk about it?
*]What's the best angle to start the conversation? My current plan is
to start with: "NFP (especially Creighton + NaPro) has a higher
success rate than IVF....." (and then somehow mention that IVF is a
grave sin) Do you think that will work?
*]Should I just shut up and pray?

Any help/thought/prayers are appreciated...

God bless,



Merry Christmas!

I’m not sure if Christmas Mass would be the best time to broach this subject with your friends if you think it might upset them at all.

Suggest they investigate NAPRO technology. It has been developed and promoted by the Pope Paul VI Institute. You can google NAPRO and you will find resources. It is all in line with Catholicism.

There was recently an article in Inside Catholic which illustrates a woman’s struggle with infertility and what she discovered about IVF. I hope it helps.


You can tell her that IVF is not pleasing to God and is prohibited by the church. At least you should make that clear to her, so that you will have fulfilled your obligation as a Catholic.

This is very very hard. As one who has also gone through IVF and conceived (before I knew Catholicism), I know it is very hard to hear church teaching on this when you want a child and can’t have one. But you must share the truth. Once you have told her and shared with her whatever you can, leave it to God and pray for her.


Also, pray to the Holy Spirit for strength and courage, and to direct you in His time. Good for you for recognizing the need to evangelize here! Very difficult. As one struggling with infertility and using the Pope Paul VI Institute, I have found that reading other couples' blogs is very helpful. These couples all use the PPVI institute as well, so there's a real sense of comradery that you're not alone. Just google "catholic infertility blog" and the first option "all you who hope" is one of the women's blogs. Hers will lead to many more. God bless!


3 -- definitely. Because it really is none of your business.


USCCB has great resources online.


Did it (although not quite as planned...)

Thanks for the suggestions.

Have a blessed Lent,



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