Attending a gay "wedding"

We have just been invited to attend a same sex wedding of the child of a close friend. I do not feel that, as Catholics, we can attend nor should we send a gift. My wife feels that even though we don’t support SS marriage we could attend due to a forty year friendship with the parents. Comments please.

I don’t think I’d go. I’d feel like it would mean I had no problem with it, but I do. I’m not sure about the gift idea. If asked, you can just say you couldn’t go for religious reasons, or something of that sort.

Thankfully, I’ve never been in a similar position. That would be a tough call. I would find it very hard to turn my back on a close friend of 40 years just because our understanding of marriage was not the same. In fact, it’s possible that your understanding of marriage is, in fact, the same, but they are just being supportive of their child. I think I’d go just to be supportive of my close friend.

You have to understand Church teaching. Is “gay marriage” OK?

Peace,
Ed

Wow Ed. Really? :shrug: So much said in few words. Well done!

As for the original post- When is it ok to compromise principles and truths for friendship? Would you have a conflict if the couple was M/F and the F an Abortionist and the M the most anti-catholic religion preacher you can think of ?

I would not go nor would I send a gift.

There are a million reasons a person can RSVP “no.” You are not obligated to offer an explanation, and if you are asked for one you can keep it vague if you are concerned about maintaining the friendship. If you see them often, you might even schedule something else that day that would make you unavailable.

My in-laws were invited to a “wedding” event between their niece and her female companion a few weeks ago. They struggled with the decision. They went (it was an out of town weekend trip). They did not attend the event itself, but attended the reception afterward.

They are glad they got a chance to see their niece, but regret that they went to the reception. In the end, they would have not gone if they had known how hard it would be to be there at all.

Here’s a question to ask yourselves: Are you ready to throw aside a 40-year friendship, plus your relationship with their daughter (whom you presumably watched grow up)?

I imagine you think this is just one thing you could miss out on, maybe make a convenient excuse, and nobody would be the wiser.

However, there is after the wedding as well. Does their daughter live in the area? Are you going to see the couple frequently afterwards? Have her parents invited you to parties/gatherings/etc where you’ll be mingling with the couple?

In other words…how far are you planning to take the “I don’t support this” stance, and are you prepared to deal with the fallout of that? Because in my experience, if parents get the impression that there’s a conflict between their child and their friend, they’ll typically choose their child.

Maybe the young lady lives far enough away and can’t make it home often, so maybe you can ‘slide’…but even then, her parents may pick up on your stance on this.

I can’t tell you what you should or shouldn’t do, but if you think this is just about whether or not to attend a wedding you don’t agree with, I’m afraid you’re in for a surprise.

I don’t think anyone who knows you are Catholic will think you are supporting gay marriage because you attend a gay wedding.

And I don’t think the people getting married really care if you support them or not.

It’s an important day for them. It’s a turning point and milestone in their lives. I think going would say something more like “I love you and value your friendship” than “I support you”

You cannot go to that “wedding”. You cannot, for the sake of your eternal soul, go to that wedding in which praise will be given for an unnatural vice. This was the reason Sodom was destroyed.

Do
Not
Go.

It doesn’t matter if you knew them for 3000 years, you cannot show support for this vice. Which would you prefer, giving up a friendship, or burning in hell for all eternity and send others with you? If you truly care about these people do you not want the greatest good for them which is going to heaven? People involved in such lifestyles will not go to heaven unless they repent.

Do not be deceived by Satan, he is the father of lies, he is a murderer from the beginning. The wicked serpent will try to tempt you. He may tell you things like “it’s okay no one will be hurt”, or “you don’t want to make them upset”, and “you knew them for all these years, you don’t want to give up this relationship”.** Pray the rosary**, it is one of your greatest weapons against the ancient serpent. Our Lady will crush the serpent. Pray to her. Pray for those people engaging in that diabolical lifestyle.

1 Peter 5:8
“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”

2 Corinthians 11:14
“And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light.”

Matthew 16:23
"But he turned and said to Peter, “Get behind me, Satan! You are a hindrance to me. For you are not setting your mind on the things of God, but on the things of man.”

Weddings give praise to love.

Love is not an unnatural vice.

What about pederasty and bestiality? Are these things “love”? What is your definition of love? Are child marriages in which the man is a middle age man or a senior and marries a 9 year old “love”? What about someone who marries their dog or some other animal? Marriage is not meant to be some type of tool for emotional fulfillment.

Love requires a certain level of equal standing between the partners that is not possible in either situation you suggested. You can’t really love a dog in the same way you love a person, and a dog definitely can’t love you in the way another person can.

But two women or two men can love each other. And many do. And in a world filled with hate and senseless violence, real love should be celebrated in all its forms.

If these couples are copulating on the dance floor, by all means, skip the wedding. But I have yet to attend any wedding that celebrated sex. They celebrate love.

And love is not a sin.

(keep in mind that you don’t know for sure what goes on behind closed doors, maybe they plan to live chastely together. who knows? :shrug: )

(And P.S > the Catholic Church is fine with middle aged men marrying 14 year old girls. So your last example is a little on the fence … I personally would say no that’s disgusting … the church apparently is basically OK with it.)

I agree. 40 years of friendship, you should go. Please remember, you are just attending this wedding, think of it as attending a church of another denomination…you do not have to believe in that religion, but can still go as a sign of friendship, respect and tolerance.

And also, it’s not your wedding, it’s your close friend’s child’s. Be happy for them. It’s their day.

Most importantly, people of all or nor religions must be willing to accept that especially in today’s world, not everyone thinks homosexuality or gay weddings are wrong nor bad. I know many people who have changed their views in light of a close friend or family member coming out.

all the best,
Dr.O

Ultimate strawman. We are talking about 2 consenting adults. Period.

=QuasiCatholic;12547564]Love requires a certain level of equal standing between the partners that is not possible in either situation you suggested. You can’t really love a dog in the same way you love a person, and a dog definitely can’t love you in the way another person can.

And two men and two women cannot love each other in the same way that a man and woman can.

But two women or two men can love each other. And many do.

Homosexual actions are not an expression of love.

And in a world filled with hate and senseless violence, real love should be celebrated in all its forms.

Why does the gay “marriage” activist need to justify so-called gay “marriage” on things other than the relationship itself?

If these couples are copulating on the dance floor, by all means, skip the wedding. But I have yet to attend any wedding that celebrated sex. They celebrate love.

:dts:

And love is not a sin.

Homosexual actions are grave sins that offend God.

(keep in mind that you don’t know for sure what goes on behind closed doors, maybe they plan to live chastely together. who knows? :shrug: )

These types of comments often come from clueless parent who still thinks it’s 1950 and all their kids are neat little virgins even after going off to college or not coming home until sunrise of the next morning…or from progressive activists who actually try to sell it as serious and expect us to nod in approval. :rolleyes:

Also, remember that the sin of scandal could be in play here as well.

(And P.S > the Catholic Church is fine with middle aged men marrying 14 year old girls. So your last example is a little on the fence … I personally would say no that’s disgusting … the church apparently is basically OK with it.)

I have no idea where this is coming from, but again it just goes to that gay “marriage” really can’t stand on its own merits as evidenced by the gay “marriage” activists trashing other relationships.

I personally would say no that’s disgusting

:rotfl:

And yet you expect everyone to be tolerant of your beliefs? :blush:

Classic!

Apologist Answer—Please Read!

catholic.com/blog/michelle-arnold/to-attend-or-not-to-attend

Thank you.

Ed

I don’t think so. Going to a “gay marriage” is offering support. Obviously, this will affect their friendship and their relationship with the young lady and her partner. I mean, “Dad, why didn’t your friends come to our wedding or send us a gift at least? I mean, it’s legal! Are they homophobic? Being homophobic is bad. This is a milestone in our lives and this is how they treat us?”

Not going will not go unnoticed.

Peace,
Ed

:rolleyes:

Whenever I see strawman/red herring/ad hominem/uncharitable cards being toss around by CAF users, it is almost always inaccurate, as it is here. :tsktsk:

The issue here is more than just “two consenting adults,” it is about Catholics finding the proper moral disposition in this case.

So instead of racing ahead to defend homosexual actions, stop and consider of being genuine service to the couple. :tsktsk:

But that means one has to comment without a progressive agenda! :slight_smile:

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