attending two churches

Hey all,

A little background first:
Many of you know about my “situation”: my husband is Traditional Anglican (before females became “priests” and homosexuality was celebrated) and I wish to convert to the Catholic Church. I’ve read “When only one converts” and I think that no matter what happens this fall is it. I’ve tried and tried to see his view on the papacy, immaculate conception etc. but every time I think this “drawing/pulling” is gone or goes away it comes back with a vengeance I cannot make it stop. I know I have to be Catholic, I feel it deep within my soul. My husband has thrown around the “you’re supposed to get your doctrine from me, I’m the head etc. etc.” I’ve explained to him that if I follow him against my conscience I might as well make him god instead of just husband. He told me that I have a choice to forsake him and our children or stop this “nonsense” and listen to him.

My question is: WHEN I become Catholic can I still attend services with him at the Anglican church besides keeping my weekly mass obligation/days of obligation? And if I can, can I still go up to the rail (it’s an traditonal Anglican church) we have small children that he wants blessed and I would have to carry/walk one up there. Should I talk to the priest and explain to him that I no longer want communion or blessings for myself but I will still accompany the little ones up to the rail. It’s a tiny church about 20 people or thereabouts so I know that it will be difficult for my husband when someone asks about me not taking communion since they think “general confession” is enough. (they’ll think that the confession is enough and there should be no reason that I don’t take the bread and wine) I’ve explained to my husband that I like the people there I like “Bob” the priest but I don’t agree with their view on communion (not a sacrifice, not transubstantiation) so I should go to a church where I believe that is-the Catholic Church. He tells me “enjoy your apple” (like Eve who was deceived). I have a very rough road ahead but I just can’t walk away from this pulling I have…I just hope I don’t end up alone on the kitchen floor crying like this “Justin” guy in “when only one converts”-his wife left him and took the kids and divorced him over his conversion. Either I do this or I will go insane every time I head “he who loves father, mother, daughter, son, wife more than me is not worthy of me”…

I’m so paranoid he’s going to change the locks when I go to RCIA…I have a friend from Coming Home Network that said she could give me a class through email/phone calls (she’s an RCIA teacher at her parish and has permission from her priest) that way I can go to get confirmed without the fight everytime I step out the door for RCIA class…

Pray for me and advice on the attendance thing would be appreciated,


My prayers are with you.

You know the choice you have to make. It is a hard choice, but Christ never said our walk would be easy.

Yes, you may still attend the Anglican church, provided you do not take their communion, and of course, provided that you meet your Sunday Mass obligation. I think having a discussion with the Anglican pastor would be a good idea. Explain your situation, that you are not able to take communion, but your husband would like your children to get a blessing.

All will be well.

Hey moderator please delete this thread due to being posted in wrong forum and duplicate thread on family forum thanks DoT

You might try PM.

I think you need to talk to your priest anyway, not just about communion but the whole parcel where you are at, at the moment. It may help you with thinking and believing and knowing what to do. I would recommend that talk. Priests can be very good listeners and its suprising what happens when we trust and share what is going off.

I like the priest at the Anglican church my husband goes to but like all Anglican priests I talked to they get defensive and upset when I say “I’m having issues with Anglicanism and want to be Catholic”.

I’m just going to be honest with him and tell him that I enjoy his church service, like him as a person, want to still support my husband’s convictions and attend with him and the children but as for communion I will not be taking it anymore because my convictions are that the Catholic mass is sacrificial in nature and the Eucharist is transubstantiation not consub. or a “mystery” as Eastern Orthodox like to put it. Hopefully he’ll just smile and say o.k. I want to talk to him alone because the last Anglican priest I talked to told me that I need to obey my husband and God will look at that as obedience and that I shouldn’t disobey his spiritual authority (my husband’s) and join another church he also told my husband that yelling is not the way to handle it and then he proceeded to give my husband a book that defends Anglicanism and my husband used it to yell at me and attack me. Hopefully I’ll have better luck this time… I’ve gone through this over and over and over again but always gave in after the yelling and pressure from my husband. I feel like I can’t do this anymore I feel like a liar, a sneak, and a coward for not following God the first time MANY years ago. To me it has to do with authority not “doctrine” although doctrine itself plays a major role. Either I stay in the “island of misfit toys” as the priest at this Anglican church says or I go swim the Tiber…I’m getting my life jacket on and jumping off the ship called Anglicanism…

Protestants like to stick together and keep someone from leaving the fold by any means possible… I’ve noticed there is some MAJOR hurt feelings in Anglicanism a real us vs. them mentality and a “how dare you papist” attitude.

At this point I’m done with the priestly bullying, and telling me to ignore my drawing from God in favor of my husband’s theology, I will take whatever happens and join the Catholic Church.

I disobey God in favor of my husband’s wishes I might as well be a member of the cult of B*** (my husband’s name)…


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