A few years ago I dated a man who ended up being, not to sound overdramatic, emotionally abusive toward me. I could give you a long list of examples, but suffice it to say that I had sweat-inducing flashbacks for some time after we stopped seeing each other. After our last extended period of time together, I was actually physically ill for a couple of months; it also exacerbated my clinical depression and anxiety greatly.
He asked for forgiveness, and I forgave him. He’s not evil – he encouraged me back to the Church and was my Cursillo sponsor. But I don’t want to be friends, not at this point anyway. Besides this obvious issue, he’s a 40-year-old man who lives a sort of transient and haphazard life, has badly managed OCD traits, and has called me up to a) simply ramble on about what he’s doing, ask nothing about me and then say goodbye abruptly, b) ask me to look something up online for him since he doesn’t have access at home or c) ask questions that are more appropriate to an adolescent or someone just starting out in life, not a 40-year-old with a college education and some life experience behind him.
So now when he calls (only once every few months) I don’t pick up. I have Caller ID, so I know it’s him. On his part, he never leaves a message, so… he can’t want to talk that badly. I don’t want to make some big “I shall never speak to you again” speech, and maybe someday I will feel differently, but I just don’t want to talk to him these days.
Do you think I’m morally obligated to anwer the phone or call him back?