Baby may die at birth. Should I buy gifts for him before he is born?

I have a dilemma and would appreciate some input.

My niece is pregnant with a baby boy diagnosed with Dandy Walker Syndrome (diagnosed by ultrasound), he may die when he is born. My mother recommended that no one in the family buy her any baby items since this may upset my niece if the baby dies. I would like to buy her and the baby something but not if it would hurt my niece. What do you think?

God bless,
Debbie

I would buy your niece something and a blessed baby bracelet with a St.Christopher medal or a Holy Face medal.These two things will comfort your niece no matter what the outcome is. And please pray for the baby(which I am sure that you are doing),and remember that God can do anything, if it in His will to heal this baby,it will not be hard for him. Arch Bishop Fulton J.Sheen has been declared venerable, it wouldn’t hurt to ask him to intercede as well. God Bless You and your family will be in my prayers:gopray:

Thank you so much for your prayers. I will pray to the Venerable Bishop Fulton Sheen. I pray that he will miraculously be healed - but, only if it is God’s will. I think my niece is in denial right now, please pray for her too.

God bless,
Debbie

I have never heard of Dandy Walker Syndrome before,what is it?I will keep all of you in my prayers:) God Bless You

Here is a place where you may find just what you’re looking for. St. Jude is one of the patron saints of our house, as I have a 10 month old with both Williams Syndrome and West Syndrome.

Buy the Baby some blessed Padre Pio oil or Chrism.

[quote=Lisa4Catholics]I have never heard of Dandy Walker Syndrome before,what is it?I will keep all of you in my prayers:) God Bless You
[/quote]

Thanks for your prayers Lisa. Here is a definition of the syndrome and the link to the website which gives the prognosis and treatment as well. It seems there are varying degrees and my niece’s little one has a very severe malformation - this is why they say that he may die at birth.

**What is Dandy-Walker Syndrome?
**Dandy-Walker Syndrome is a congenital brain malformation involving the cerebellum (an area at the back of the brain that controls movement) and the fluid filled spaces around it. The key features of this syndrome are an enlargement of the fourth ventricle (a small channel that allows fluid to flow freely between the upper and lower areas of the brain and spinal cord), a partial or complete absence of the cerebellar vermis (the area between the two cerebellar hemispheres), and cyst formation near the internal base of the skull. An increase in the size of the fluid spaces surrounding the brain as well as an increase in pressure may also be present.

ninds.nih.gov/disorders/dandywalker/dandywalker.htm

[quote=Scott_Lafrance]Here is a place where you may find just what you’re looking for. St. Jude is one of the patron saints of our house, as I have a 10 month old with both Williams Syndrome and West Syndrome.
[/quote]

Hi Scott, Thank you for pointing me toward St. Jude. I will keep your little one and your family in my Rosary today.
God bless, Debbie

[quote=Bill_A]Buy the Baby some blessed Padre Pio oil or Chrism.
[/quote]

Thanks Bill, great idea.
God bless, Debbie

Hi Debbie,

You could also buy the child a star at:

starregistry.com/

that way their light will shine for all to see.

http://www.starregistry.com/imx/isr_logo.gif

I know of groups of crocheters who make blankets and donate them to the hospitals for babies who die at birth. This gives the family something to wrap the precious little one in while they hold him to say good bye. Perhaps you could make or purchase a blanket for the baby, and that can be used if the baby has a long or short life. My prayers are with you.

[quote=debbie m.]I have a dilemma and would appreciate some input.

My niece is pregnant with a baby boy diagnosed with Dandy Walker Syndrome (diagnosed by ultrasound), he may die when he is born. My mother recommended that no one in the family buy her any baby items since this may upset my niece if the baby dies. I would like to buy her and the baby something but not if it would hurt my niece. What do you think?

God bless,
Debbie
[/quote]

I have been lurking, but this is the one that made me sign up and respond.

One of my sisters was told 14 and 13 years ago that her last two pregnancies would be stillbirths, when all this diagnostic stuff started hitting every baby in earnest. While we all prayed, HARD, we also wanted to keep a positive attitude. So YES, give gifts!!! Baby rosaries, baby medals with pins, blankets, small stuffed animals…and maybe gift certificates that can be used later on. And there’s nothing wrong with giving her little gifts, as well.

My sister felt that the only gift she would be able to give them was to be sure they received the Sacrament of Baptism. So, for each birth, she made each baby a beautiful baptismal gown. She figured if the children lived, they would have a memento of her love, to pass down to her grandchildren; and if not, then the baby could be buried in the gown, still receiving one last gift of love. She made sure somebody was on call to baptize each child the minute it was born, breathing or not. She brought the gowns with her in her luggage, not ever expecting to use them in time, but for burial, because she didn’t trust anybody else to ensure the funeral home got them.

BTW- One boy is in high school, and one in middle school. Neither boy fit in his lovely handmade gown. Each was way too big to begin to fit into either one.

1 Like

I think the baptism gown is an excellent idea!

Also, consider buying a gift, but holding off giving it until the baby is born.

Another thought: a gift card to Target or some other store that sells more than just baby stuff. Chances are, they’re not preparing for this baby, so if they need to buy stuff, they will need to be able to buy it quickly. And, if the baby doesn’t make it, she can spend the money on something else, when she’s at that stage of mourning where getting out of the house and buying some dumb thing can cheer you up a bit.

I do pray that the little one is going to be OK. That is soooo sad!

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.