Sorry if this is in the wrong place btw :shrug:
Well last night Saturday night went out in town as per, but, infact BUT I had been thinking about different aspects about catholicness (is that a word?) over a few days and slowly persuading myself against it, you know when nothing seems to be working out in your head to shift you towards it?
And so for the past few months when going out clubbing I would have a little voice inside me saying ‘come on now, you’ve had a good night, no need to drink anymore’ but this time there was nothing, and I didn’t care that I was a total mess, at all.
Ended up going home with 5 boys that I used to know 2 years ago in which one lives across from me, and falling asleep to a movie, to wake up about 20 mins ago thinking ‘oh dear what on earth have I done’ (no not in THAT kinda way don’t worry) , walked across to my house to my mum waking up and saying I apparently said this and that in the night and ALL the neighbors heard :nope: And I don’t even remember it so of course denied it and said I only just got back from town, but it sounds like sooo something i would say, and she sounded so angry and disappointed, but I already am with myself already
Basically, I got smashed last night, and HATE that fact, so I can’t really go to church tomorrow (mum would refuse to go with me anyway, it’s bad enough when I’ve not done anything!), yet I know that if I was to go it would help get me back on track, does that make sense? (or of course it would make me understand why people have been persuading me not to go to church, you know when someone picks out a fault and THEN you can see it?)
I don’t know what to do; I don’t think mum would come with in a million years, and I wouldn’t be able to have communion I don’t think (is getting wasted a mortal sin?)
Generally this is a bit of a useless thread in which I’m not really asking a specific question, just wanting some opinions in my oh so long rantathon ( now THAT should be a word, ranathon:thumbsup: )