Balancing everything


#1

I still struggle with balancing everything in my life. How do you prioritize? How do you decide what let slide? Is there any good books our there you can suggest (although reading is one of the things that seems to continously be sliding off my “schedule”)?

For background, I’m a mother of school age children (“high-maintenance” - adopted at older ages). I have a part-time job while the kids are at school. My husband is gone 12-13 hours per week day. I take care of the house, finances, schedules, pets, etc…

Help!


#2

Well, for me personally, my part-time job, as much as we need the money, would be GONE if my working were damaging the kids. They definitely come before anything else.

My housework is on a continual slide because I want to spend time with DH when I can, and I am taking care of kids. I could do better, but I prioritize loving my man and my kids first. I can always load the dishwasher later, or even the next morning if DH really keeps me “busy,” if ya know what I mean. :wink:


#3

found this thread
forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=11758

thanks for the reply - the job is while the kids are at school, I love it, it gives me some exercise, helps me relax, and the only way it is negative for the family, I think, is that I spend less time on housework.


#4

My main rule is just this: kids and hubby first, everything else after them. Can’t go wrong with that. Glad you found a helpful thread.


#5

NB, we have a med-large family. It has taken every fiber we both have to take care of the family, house, daily life etc.:o Things slide all the time. For us, the single biggest thing we have done to help our children and family daily life is live as TV Free as possible, we only have the 7 channel cable package. So we keep the large sewer pipe of TV out of our home plus we only allow it to be turned on, for the weekends. Family time, homework, prayers are the week night things we do. It is really hard these days because everyday we feel like is a new day of blessings and battles.:cool:


#6
  1. First is your marriage. You, hubby and God. No compromise. If you lose your relationship, everything else falls apart.

  2. Second is the children, but only as far as they do not conflict with #1. You can work for 50+ years but you only get the kids for about 18.

  3. Third is everyone else, including work, that does not conflict with #1 and #2.

It ain’t easy. My beloved and I do it with limits. We set aside time for us (#1) - doesn’t have to be big stuff, maybe just going to WaWa for coffee. Each of our kids gets to do one sport and one non-sport non-school activity because that is what our time allows. Extended family, work, Church activites, all fall in line after these. In Marriage Encounter, we call it following God’s plan instead of the World’s plan. It ain’t easy, but few things worthwhile are.


#7

You might enjoy this book

mothersruleoflife.com/about.html

Peirlot says you have to have balance in the five areas of life in order: prayer, person, partner, parent, provider.

If they aren’t in the right priority order, then things go off kilter.


#8

A business consultant was brought in for a company I worked for gave some advice that I still use.

You put things in categories:

First, determine what is urgent and what is important

What is not urgent and what is unimportant

Urgnet/Important has first slot

Important/not urgent has a slot

Urgent unimportant has a slot

And unimportant not urgent gets the last slot.

It helps me see things on a grid.


#9

In the words of Mother Teresa…‘do what is in front of you.’ I say that a lot on here, but it’s true! Concentrate on what you need to get done for that hour, that set of hours, that day. Look at each task as a gift from God, and embrace it with great joy.

Don’t feel like you have to get everything done before bedtime. Just take care of what is most urgent, and leave the rest for the next day. When tomorrow arrives…begin again. Pretty soon, you will be not only organized, but less frazzled. That one sentence from Mother Teresa helped me so much!

((hugs))


#10

Time Management for Catholics by Dave Durand from Sophia Inst. Press


#11

Here’s an example. On Saturday, I wanted to go to confession, but, there was a conflict with a child’s sports practice, so I took the child to practice. I was putting the child before me, but afterword I felt bad because I was putting the child’s sport over my relationship with God.


#12

In the above situation, I’d have either called the Parish and arranged for an earlier/later Confession OR dropped the child off at practice, drive to Confession and then pick the child up after Confession.

Last alternative, arrange for one of the other team parents to take the child to practice.

Going to Confession is more important than sports practice, in my book.


#13

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