Greetings and Praise God everyone. I'm a semi-recently married husband with a 1 month old baby boy :) I married my wife relatively early by US standards (I was 22). Several years later we have both aided each other in becoming closer to God and of course beginning to expand our family with the addition of our first son. My parents came to the US from Poland and then divorced when the stresses of life in a foreign country increased. From the onset, my mother was extremely against our marriage based on our young age, the fact that we were both in school, and that I met my wife in Poland while on vacation. She stands by her viepoint to this day despite the fact that we have become relatively successful in terms of finances and the like (not to mention the increase in faith I have experienced first hand).
This year we have decided to move to Poland. This is obviously a huge decision considering we have careers and a home here in the US. However, aside from wanting to try something new, we feel that Poland is a better place to raise our son and hopefully more children to come. We have a large family there to help out and it just seems that faith is more prevelant among the population as is evident by the numerous churches, masses, relgious activities, etc. My wife and I both love the US but this is a decision which simply feels right at the moment. Furthermore, we got married and began having kids early, so even if 10 years later we decide it was a bad idea - no harm done, we just come back.
Here lies the problem, despite anger and tension from my mother's side before hand, this news totally shocked and upset her. Aside from the fact that she loves her new grandson she was very sick last year and feels that she will need our help in the future. I assured her that once retirement time comes (10-12 years away) Poland would be a good choice anyways. Of course an 8 hour direct flight is also not that big a deal for now.
Unfortunately, she refuses to hear any logic. She claims I am not fulfilling my obligations and duties as a son and am sinning (not honoring mother...) She tells me that she will never consider moving to Poland and needs to focus only on her own needs and future security at the moment. She feels that she can not count on me and I am doing wrong by pleasing my wife (whom she thinks is the sole decision maker).
Aside from alleviating these tensions for the well being of everyone involved I really want my mom to understand the importance of our family unit (husband/wife/children). We get into heated arguments about her own lifestyle. My mom has 5 crosses/pictures of St. Mary in her bedroom, holy water, and a rosary in each drawer - yet, she does not live by the bible considering her live in boyfriend of 10+ years. I am the leader of my family and I need to do what I feel is right for them. She simply can not grasp that the hierarchy of my life is now God....Wife....Children....Parents
Please help! Thanks and God Bless.