Baptism..would we be able to?

My son is 3 months old. My boyfriend and I would like to have him baptized in the Catholic church. However, I am not catholic, I was raised lutheran, but would love to “convert” over to being catholic. My boyfriend was raised in the catholic church, however never was able to be confirmed, cause his mother could not get him to his confirmation classes (due to being a single mother of 3, and working all the time). He too would also like to be confirmed in the catholic church. Would we be able to get our son baptized by like this summer? I just wondered, since he was born out of wedlock, and technically neither of us are catholic. However the Godparents we have chosen are both catholic. I’ve been trying to research it online, and couldn’t come up with a clear answer. I know we’d also have to discuss it with the priest at the parish here, my boyfriend knows him a little. But since my boyfriend works most weekends, he’s unable to make it to church. I would like to start attending…but I feel itimidated to attend the catholic church by myself, would I even be allowed? I feel like there is so much I don’t know, but I would like to know. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

First of all, at least one party should be a practicing Catholic. Does your boyfriend’s schedule totally rule out assisting at Mass on Saturday evening, early Sunday morning or late Sunday afternoon? Check your diocesan website to see the Mass times in your area. Surely there is one parish that will meet your scheduling needs.

The second has to do with your current situation. Are you living together? Nowhere in your post do you mention if you intend to get married. While the parental situation may not negate the right of the child to be baptized, there needs to be a firm commitment on the part of the parents to be authentic witnesses of the Faith to their children.

Now, regarding the Godparents, if they are married, they need to be validly married in the Catholic Church, as, they, too, will have to provide an authentic witness of the Faith to the child.

It is certainly commendable that you want to baptize your child in the Catholic Church. However, there is more to the baptism than the ceremony. Please, please find a parish as soon as possible, inquire about RCIA for yourself if you do intend on becoming Catholic, register there, and then talk to the pastor. Of course you can attend Mass. The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass is the public prayer of the Church. Of course, since you cannot receive Holy Communion, just remain in your pew and pray, but, other than that, please, please go to Mass.

However, as I stated before, you and your boyfriend also need to have a serious talk about your current situation.

I don’t want to sound judgmental, but, these are things that need to be examined. After all, the baptism of a child into the Church is a lifelong commitment that should not be taken lightly.

Yes…sorry I didn’t put that in my original post. We definately intend on getting married. We do live together. He could probably find a way to get to church somehow. I don’t know when they even have services, cause I looked online, and it’s not on there. But my boyfriend works overnights at the hospital. For us this is not just about the baptism and the ceremony, we wish to raise our child in the catholic faith. It’s a committment we want to make for him, and to get ourselves a little more back on track with our faith. Our godparents are married, and they were married in the catholic church. I’m just trying to figure this all out, cause it’s slightly different than the Lutheran church. I’ve asked my mom, but she can’t remember, she grew up catholic, but converted to lutheran when she got married. I was going to try and attend mass tomorrow morning, but I may have to wait until next week. I can attend every week, and my boyfriend can probably attend every other, due to his work schedule.

See if the hospital has Mass. that could be one venue. You could also check to see the Masses in the diocese where you live. A diocese if an ecclesial territory under the care of the bishop. Once you find out the name of your diocese, look up its website and then find your city. Pull that up and it should give you the Mass times for all of the parishes in your town. Then, visit the parish whose schedule is a good fit for you and your boyfriend. Both of you should try to make an appointment to see the pastor once you are settled into your new parish. This is first and foremost.

Another easy way to find the Mass schedules of the churches closest to you is to visit If you type in your zip code, it will pull up the parishes in the area, starting with the closest ones.

Best of luck,


Isnt there a problem for the boyfriend being confirmed if they live together?

In this situation he wont be able to recieve communion, and if there are plans of getting married i think he must be confirmed first, or am i wrong?

This is definitely a case that must be taken to a priest but as far as i know there is the possibillity to have the marriage ritual at the same time as his confirmation.

So the case could be solved quite easy, just take it to a priest and he will inform you how to do it.

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