Been turned down by two congregation

I have been turned down by two religious congregation (missionary). I dont know what to make of it since I was in high school I’ve always thought I was a nun/monk. They have the same reason: mental health issues. Their concern is that I may not be able to handle the stress of the missionary life.

The sisters, however, encouraged me to try the monks—I have visited one…but haven’t gone to live for a week or so with them.

I am wondering if the monk’s life is less stressful than the missionary life…and if I have a chance that I may fit there? I mean, God didn’t prolly designed me to be a missionary.I have a very great desire to pray all day and to celebrate the mass all my life. I love silence and recollection…you may call me a highly sensitive person…and a burden bearer (as Carol Brown would put it)…

From your own description of yourself, I would recommend you investigate the possibility of becoming a Diocesan hermit. You are called to a life of prayer and love attending Mass, but you also like solitude and would most likely find community life very intense and burdensome for you personally. You would need some way to support yourself, as the Diocese will not do this for you. You could try living the life for some years before approaching the Bishop and asking if you could be consecrated as a hermit.

Mental illness is not necessarily a bar to religious life, but if you are on medication and you still find you are extremely sensitive and feel like a burden bearer, then both missionary work and community life do not sound like good fits for you personally.

This is just my opinion at this time. You don’t state your age or life experience - perhaps with time, things might change and you might feel better able to deal with other forms of religious life, but at present your responsibility is to care for yourself and get stronger psychologically. Best wishes.

Have you spoken with the vocations director of your diocese?

I am confused. Do you want to be a nun(sister) or a brother? Perhaps this confusion is why you have been turned down by two different congregations. By all means continue your education and also an understanding of the church. Praying for you.

actually I want to be either a sister or a nun. I tried the missionaries first because I want to make sure that I tried something more challenging…I mean, I dont feel worthy for the purely contemplative life…but since i’ve been advised I may not fit in the missionary work. I’m really thinking to concentrate on discerning at contemplative religious orders. Personality wise though…i’m really highly introverted and would really prefer the contemplative life.
Thank you for your prayers. The rejection is getting into me sometimes, but I have to move on…

The Holy Ghost works on attraction. Try a cloistered retreat with the Visitation, and see how the life sits with you.

You can also take a look at my main site:


thank you. I’m searching in another congregation. I’d like to be a nun, but I’ll try the sisters first. I spoke with the vocation directress of this congregation and told her what happened to me in the previous two. I was surprised she didn’t mind at all…

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit