Being single


#1

I have recently learned that being single is not a vocation. What if you are single and liking it? I am sort of perplexed about this because I know marriage is a vocation. Does that imply that I have no vocation now that my civil marriage was annulled many years ago?


#2

My understanding is that, technically, singleness is not a vocation. But that doesn't mean you can't use your singleness in service of the greatest vocation, which is to love God and love neighbor.

For me as a single person, I am open to marriage but also open to the idea that I will remain celibate and chaste throughout my life. It is up to God. But regardless, I am trying to find ways to grow in my faith and serve God.

If singleness is not a vocation, the thing God calls you to do with your singleness is a vocation. (Someone will correct me if I'm wrong).


#3

Singleness is a vocation.


#4

[quote="devoutchristian, post:3, topic:325853"]
Singleness is a vocation.

[/quote]

Not if it's transitional, which it often is.


#5

[quote="Havard, post:4, topic:325853"]
Not if it's transitional, which it often is.

[/quote]

So what about those who never find someone but otherwise lead good, holy lives? Did good just forget them? I know two brothers, both single, who live together, are great men in their 60s and would have been great husbands. Do they just not have a vocation.


#6

[quote="WildCatholic, post:5, topic:325853"]
So what about those who never find someone but otherwise lead good, holy lives? Did good just forget them? I know two brothers, both single, who live together, are great men in their 60s and would have been great husbands. Do they just not have a vocation.

[/quote]

I don't know what their vocations are, but it doesn't mean they don't have any. I personally am single and approaching 40, and I am still not sure what my own is. I don't feel like God's forgotten about me, we talk all the time. ;)


#7

[quote="Havard, post:6, topic:325853"]
I don't know what their vocations are, but it doesn't mean they don't have any. I personally am single and approaching 40, and I am still not sure what my own is. I don't feel like God's forgotten about me, we talk all the time. ;)

[/quote]

So if your'e still single, how can you say it doesn't exist. If you die single, won't you feel like your life wasn't really all it could have been since you didn't have any vocation other than the general call to holiness?

Also, and this is adressed to anyone reading this. If there are only two vocations, should someone who is single and hasn't found someone become a priest or religious. I've often thought about this, because i've often though if by 30 that I haven't found someone I'd give it a try. Not because I feel its my only option, but I've always been someone who probably could fit well in any vocation.


#8

[quote="WildCatholic, post:7, topic:325853"]
So if your'e still single, how can you say it doesn't exist. If you die single, won't you feel like your life wasn't really all it could have been since you didn't have any vocation other than the general call to holiness?

Also, and this is adressed to anyone reading this. If there are only two vocations, should someone who is single and hasn't found someone become a priest or religious. I've often thought about this, because i've often though if by 30 that I haven't found someone I'd give it a try. Not because I feel its my only option, but I've always been someone who probably could fit well in any vocation.

[/quote]

How can I say what doesn't exist? I'm afraid I'm not following you. My earlier point was that transitional single life isn't a vocation. Not that single people don't have vocations.


#9

[quote="Havard, post:8, topic:325853"]
How can I say what doesn't exist? I'm afraid I'm not following you. My earlier point was that transitional single life isn't a vocation. Not that single people don't have vocations./QUOTE

Sorry if I wasn't clear. I meant that wouldn't you feel kind of cheated if you died knowing you were just in a state of transition as far as vocation is concerned. Also, what about those who are unable to marry such as the disabled. Are they in a transition state. Tell me if i'm wrong as far as the church goes, but I feel that those who are disabled are called to be single, even if it is painful for them. I also think there are some people who just feel they'd serve better as single than married or in religious life. I myself feel that i'd love to be a single lay missionary. It allows me the freedom to see if i'm married, and I can leave when I wish, but allows me to serve God.

[/quote]


#10

Being single is a vocation. There is the consecrated single life, though not all single people have to live the consecrated life.
There is a woman in my parish who has never been married. She works extensively with our parish, with various groups.
We also have a consecrated virgin at my parish.


#11

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