So as a wife, I have greater knowledge of my husband’s actions that the rest of the world does. When I see my husband do an action that is objectively sinful, what responsibility do I have to encourage him to go to confession if he doesn’t plan to go on his own?
Do I say nothing, since it’s between him and God?
Give a gentle suggestion?
Invite him to go when I’m going?
Insist on it before we go Mass on Sunday?
Beware of the proverb
“Cast not pearls before swine”
-Bearing that in mind, if I was you, I’d mention to him that you believe the activity is sinful.
If he argues, and shows no sign of remorse, refer to the above proverb
If he shows remorse, encourage that remorse.
Is he a practicing Catholic? Would he consider your perspective on his actions in a respectful, objective manner, or would he get defensive and lash out causing marital strife? On one hand, you have the pearls before swine thing mentioned above, on the other, it’s your job to get him to heaven.
Personally, my husband and I don’t believe in god. But, if I see him do something wrong, careless, thoughtless, or what have you, I do try to point it out. He considers what I’ve said and usually agrees and is grateful that I pointed it out so that he could set things right. He does the same for me. We keep each other in line well and I love that about our marriage. But it comes down to the nature of your relationship.
Why not get in the habit of going to monthly Confession together? You don’t have to be in a state of mortal sin to use the sacrament…venial sins can also be confessed. I know I could probably go every day if I had the opportunity!!
That way, if the two of you are going monthly, your DH, as well as yourself, will grow in grace and strength to keep fighting the good fight.
Also, by doing this there’s no need to say anything to your husband…he’s an adult, and will know what to say when he goes to Confession!
Invite him to go when your going. Remind him that we are all sinners, but that God in His infinite mercy and love welcomes us back every time. Remind him also of the graces received from confession which gives us strength of faith. God bless.