Boyfriend tried to attack me in his sleep

First let me say my boyfriend would never knowingly hurt me. He would never hit me or physically abuse me. That said he has what I believe to be sleeping issues. He has smacked me in the face before when he was asleep because he was thrashing around so much. It took an alarming turn a few days ago. I woke up at around 6am because he he was climbing on top of me. He woke up when I pushed at him, said sorry and went back to sleep. When I got up a few hours later he admitted that that had scared him earlier. He said he had been having one of his “punching dreams”, and if he hadn’t woken up he thinks it would have gone very bad.
I’m a little worried about this now. Could this be some sort of sleep disorder?

We cannot give medical advice or psychological advice on this forum. He needs to see a doctor to be evaluated.

And, of course, this being a Catholic site we should also stress it is not morally sound to be sleeping with a person who is not your spouse in the first place. And doubly imprudent to be doing so with someone who has these sorts of issues. So, separate yourself from that situation until he resolves it.

I would recommend that he see a counselor/psychologist, but like 1ke said, we can’t really give advice in this area. There is obviously something going on though.

You would also be wise to not sleep with him until this is resoved, because you could really get hurt.

And to echo 1ke again, “this being a Catholic site we should also stress it is not morally sound to be sleeping with a person who is not your spouse in the first place.”

Get him to a doctor!!! I have violent episodes in my sleep too, they result from sleep apnea and they happen when I’m literally suffocating. But, it could happen for any number of reasons, that’s why he needs a medical and mental health checkup.

Other than that, if he would never knowingly hurt you, you aren’t asking if you should be angry with him are you? Because my answer is no.

Well, I’m not catholic so sleeping with him is not an issue for me:shrug:

My opinion: I would sleep separately for a while and see if he still has these “dreams”. I wonder if your presence is making him feel like he needs to fight or something. I think it’s definitely worth consulting a doctor about. That is scary.

Are you an “earth” pagan or Wiccan? I read up on paganism and considered myself one years ago… But never delved into Wicca. I found it hard to find pagans that weren’t involved in Wicca just a bit… Anyway…

Keep us posted.

Right, and there are many non-Catholics here and they’re all quite welcome, I’m sure. But why post this here? You have to realize that this is going to come across as trolling, it’s not much different than someone asking for advice about their homosexual marriage.

My husband has a diagnosed REM sleep disorder which prevents his muscles from going into the normal state of ‘paralysis’ when he’s dreaming. He therefore moves, kicks out, speaks, twitches and sometimes hits out in his sleep. He has also completely thrown himself out of bed on one occasion, injuring his knee and hip which still aren’t better a year later.

There is a drug which is often helpful, but it didn’t agree with my husband at all and made it worse. However, if your boyfriend turns out to have this kind of sleep disorder it might work for him, and he should see his doctor about this.

We now try to keep drinking glasses etc well clear of him and he sleeps with his back to me, as I wake up quickly if he starts moving around a lot. If that happens, I just half-wake him by touching his shoulder and speaking to him, and that seems to settle it for a while. I’m more worried about him falling out of bed again, as he already has trouble walking very far.

And if you were not sleeping with your " boy friend, " you wouldn’t have to worry about these things. Don’t you know that you are should not be sleeping with anyone but your husband? Perhaps God is trying to tell you something. If you don’t listen, things will just go from bad to worse.


I don’t really think that is fair. The OP has over a thousand posts, I would hardly call that trolling.

Her response to us was honest, she was asking about what he is doing in his sleep. People have suggested he get psychological help, or that she separate herself to keep from physically being harmed. She has not tried to convert anyone, nor has she been rude to people that pointed out their/our Catholic beliefs. Why don’t we just help her with what she asked us this time?

I’m with 1ke.

Please seek medical advice from a trusted health professional.

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