Hello. I'm now 20 years old and a few years back I considered being a nun. I'm still not Catholic, this is due to parental issues (in fact I was only allowed to be baptized non-denominational Christian and am only Christian in immediate family, the rest are Unitarian.) I do still go through occasional periods of wanting to be married with children but yet, I'm quite happy not being married or dating either. In fact I have never dated and turned down one male at work who was interested in me. The first time I brought up the idea of being a nun to my parents was in high school. Needless to say they did flip.
It was claimed to be a waste of my time and their college tuition money. They were not amused at all. I believe deeply my mother still hopes I will get married someday but has stated I'm her "wildcard" child. To go back to my current life I ended up stopping going to church due to how awkward it got in the house. My parents do believe in evolution and have brought such topics up to my siblings in front of me. I find it's best not to speak out or it will cause massive problems. I even once wanted to join a Christian group on college campus but due to it being a Baptist group and not deemed highly in my parents eyes I did not. Instead I have been trying little by little to learn about the Catholic Faith and keep my prayers behind my closed bedroom door.
When I first found out about consecrated virginity I realized this may be something for me. Our loving Lord has helped me more than I know, and more than I deserve at times. He has always been there for me even when others walk away. Being very shy I am slowly learning he can be my best friend if I let him. And possibly more if I can open my heart to him. The idea of still being in the world is a positive one as well. As for me I am not so sure I would get the same feelings out of a cloistered lifestyle anymore. And even though at times I think I shy away from the idea due to family issues, Our Lord keeps bringing me back. I keep having the urge to read vocation stories, and to look up these two vocations. Even though I'm young I can't help thinking that I may be called, and all I need to do is listen. I want the Lord to consume me fully, and to show others what he has done for me and can do for them. From being a disabled child doctors thought may never walk who had learning disabilities, to a college student who went through some rough patches but is doing better than a girl with her disabilities should, it can only be an act of grace that allowed for this.
I love our Lord and wish to grow ever deeper with him.
Advice and thoughts are appreciated on this topic.