My cousin identifies as gay and has decided to marry his longtime partner next year (which is legal in our State of Oregon). After much prayer, deliberation with our spiritual director, and research, my husband and I have decided that we should not attend the wedding. We figure that by not attending the wedding, we are loving my cousin in the best way possible and keeping ourselves from supporting an act that we believe is harmful to my cousin both in this life and in eternity. The remainder of my family (parents, siblings, grandparents, etc.) has decided to attend the wedding. While they (for the most part) do not believe in homosexual marriage, they believe that if they do not attend the wedding, my cousin and his family will remove themselves from our lives and we will never see them again. Based on my cousin and his family’s response to my husband and me revealing that we will not be attending the wedding, I believe my family is correct in their assumption that my cousin and his family would no longer want to associate with us. My family justifies their decision to attend the wedding based on their belief that there will be no one to act as Christ in my cousin and his family’s lives and possibly lead them back to the Catholic faith if our families split.
Is it possible, as a Catholic, to justifiably attend a “gay marriage”? For example, it is acceptable to attend for the purpose of not creating division and avoiding possible permanent separation in the family?