I was born and raised Methodist. My son was baptized Methodist. After my divorce when he was 5, I stopped going to any religious services. I did not raise my children in any faith, or even with a good knowledge of Christ.
After years away from any faith, I was called back by God and eventually to the Catholic Church. When my son was 12 we converted to Catholicism. We were brought in to a very liberal parish (I didn’t know that at the time). My children were taught the faith, quickly by a married couple who had just moved to the area. According to my children their instruction in the faith was rather pitiful. The priest told us new converts that we did not have to go to confession, since our first Eucharist would absolve us of our sins. I now know that this was wrong, but I didn’t know it then.
Anyway, my son never liked going to confession. This has been a constant sticking point for him. Because we weren’t instructed in it, we didn’t go for years. Eventually, as I learned more about the faith, I realized that we needed to go. Under duress, my son went maybe 2 times. Eventually when he moved out he stopped going to Mass at all.
Prior to meeting his fiancé, he was turning his life around and had told me that he planned to go to confession and return to the Church.
But that all changed, and they have moved in together and plan to marry in a Lutheran service. She is divorced as well. My son has rejected the idea that she should get an annulment. He thinks the Catholic Church holds no authority, and an annulment is just giving "a bunch of old men money so they can say that God says her first marriage was never valid. "
My question is this. Can I attend his wedding. Obviously, I love my son. I pray for him to return to the Church. I don’t want him t be living in sin, but I realize his marriage cannot be valid as long as this situation persists. I just don’t know what to do. At this point he is not open to any discussion. He responds to all Catholic positions with typical anti-Catholic statements.
My concern is that he is already on the road to total denial of the Catholic faith. To reject his wedding ceremony, would be (in his eyes) to reject him and his fiancé. I was hoping to keep the door open for discussion. I pray that eventually he will return and bring his fiancé with him.
I was divorced and remarried in a civil ceremony. I had no idea this was invalid until a priest told me. I received an annulment and then had my marriage blessed.
Thanks for your help.