Can I attend the wedding of a baptized Catholic getting married outside of Church?

My wife’s cousin was baptized and received 1st communion as a young child, over 20 years ago. She was never confirmed and has rarely gone to Catholic mass in the past 20+ years. I’m pretty sure she’s never formally declared that she was leaving the Catholic Church. She’s getting married next year on a stage where the theme to the wedding will be Duck Dynasty. The wedding party would like some of my boys to have roles in the wedding. Are we, as faithful Catholics, permitted to attend the wedding and/or have my boys play a role in it? We don’t see the bride-to-be very often and are happy for her finding a soon-to-be-husband and we don’t want to appear as snobs by not going to the wedding ceremony, but we also want to make sure we are following the Church’s teachings.

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