If anyone could please help with advice on this, it would be GREATLY appreciated. Hopefully I am posting this in the right place.
The situation is: my mother is 84 years old, she has been a devout Catholic all her life. We are in Southern California, Los Angeles. My mom was happily married for nearly 6 decades to my wonderful father, a Korean war veteran, and they lived together until his passing last year. Since his death, she has been temporarily living in a spare bedroom with my sister, but it is clear that my sister (who works full time and has a family) cannot take care of our mom on her own, and she needs some kind of assisted living setup for her remaining years. Mom also does not get on with my sister’s husband, so the living situation is clearly not working.
A few weeks ago, mom fell and broke her hip. She went to the hospital, they fixed her up and now she is in rehab. The rehab place is going to release her in a few days, so we are now desperate to find her a place to live because my sister’s husband is refusing to allow her to come back to stay in their home.
So the only solution is to find her a place for seniors where she will receive the appropriate care. And since she is such a devout Catholic, I think the only type of place where she will be happy is a facility that emphasizes this Catholic aspect in a way that will bring her peace and comfort in her remaining years. Seeing nuns and priests and various items makes her happy in a very profound way, and I think she really needs that now that dad is gone.
So we have been calling around to different Catholic senior living facilities but we are shocked how hard it is to get into them (because of waiting lists) and more importantly how expensive they can be, typically 4-7 thousand dollars per month after all costs have been factored in (mom’s budget including pension etc would be about $2,500 per month). We have tried all kinds of different places between our home down in San Diego, all the way up to Santa Barbara, but we have been told basically “sorry, we can’t help you” so many times it’s not even funny. We would be happy with any place that is not too expensive but will at least give her the basic care and compassion that a person needs at that age. It very upsetting and demoralizing. They apparently are not willing to work with people financially. We have no idea how the residents can afford to live there, assuming they are all not LA millionaires. Also we have been told many times that the fact that my mom is on an HMO medical plan is not going to help her when she applies.
Can anyone suggest anywhere we can try. Are there no Catholic assisted living type places that are affordable by elderly people with modest incomes? We are pretty desperate here, and don’t know what to do. It’s This is such a frustrating process. If anyone has any ideas, they would be greatly appreciated. Thank you in advance and God bless you.