Catholic Teenager, Protestant Mom. How to get to Church?

Hello, I am converting to Catholicism this Easter because I believe God is calling me to the Church. He has worked on my for some time now, and I finally have knowledge that he has chosen for me, the right Church. The Catholic Church

Anyways, my WHOLE family is Protestant. I will probably be the first Catholic in my family ever. My nearest Catholic Church is 20 [35 minutes] miles away from my house. Sometimes, my mother does not desire to attend Mass with me, and I have no car or way to get down there to mass, since my whole family is protestant and have no desire of attending a Mass.

My parents were raised in the Baptist Church, and became less active, therefore, never attending a Baptist service unless it was a special occasion. This was my same attitude. Alas, I was raised up again and was dragged to the front steps of the Catholic Church. But like I said, my parents do not have a will or desire to attend Church.

Because of me, and me alone, my Mom may attend a Sunday, or weekday, mass with me on occasion. But once I get confirmed, I am a little worried, since it is a Mortal sin to miss mass, how will I make it to mass EVERY single Sunday when my mother has no intention of driving because of Gas or any other issue.

I pray a lot over this issue, and trust the Lord will have a splendid future intended for me in this issue, but I just need some help.

**If I cannot make it to Mass because of my mother not able to take me, where does the sin lie? Does it lie on me since I am the Catholic? Or does it lie on my Mother, but she is not Catholic, nor obliged? I wish to go to mass, but my mother doesn’t, and I am reliant upon her. **

Any suggestions or answers? Thank you!

It’s not a mortal sin if you miss mass because you can’t make it. Missing mass because you have no way to get there, or because you have to work and can’t get out of it, or because you’re in the hospital in traction are not sins. It’s only a sin when you CAN make it to mass and choose not to. When you choose purposely something over God.

First off, let me start by saying welcome home to the church!

Let’s start with the question of where the sin lies:

  1. your duty is to do whatever is within reasonable means to attend mass and therefore to meet your Sunday obligation. Beyond reasonable means, you are dispensed from your Sunday obligation, just as if you were too sick to attend as well. So if your mom won’t take you, and you have no transportation or reasonable means, then you don’t incur any sin.
  2. Your mom is not catholic. Three things are required to incur mortal sin (such as missing mass). These are: sufficient will, sufficient knowledge, and grave matter. Obviously it is grave matter, and your mom has free will, but since she is baptist it is likely she is ignorant of HER and YOUR Sunday obligation to attend mass (yes, ALL people are called to attend mass, not just official catholics!). Since she is ignorant of this belief, then it is doubtful that she would incur sin for not taking you (and for not attending herself).

Now for the answer: your best solution here is to talk to the priest and have him see if a parish family (preferably one with kids your age!) that lives near you would be willing to give you a ride with them to mass. Granted the diversity of modern society, many priests are familiar with your kind of situation and can help.

Speak to the priest or pastor. Some Churches have lists of members who will drive others to Church – or they know the parishoners closest to you. Get to know the other members and their parents. You may find one who is nearby enough and would certainly not deny you an opportunity to get to Church. You are in RCIA? Do any members live near enough to you that you can make an arrangement to get a ride for Mass?

Welcome to the Church and God Bless.

Welcome home!

If you are unable to make it to Mass, there is no sin. Sin tends to be dependent on one’s own choice. Catholics don’t believe that God punishes us for things that aren’t our fault. The fact alone that you feel so strongly about attending Mass and becoming a Catholic shows that you are becoming a good Christian, indeed :thumbsup:

That being said, you should look into ways to attend Mass, even if it is inconvenient. Before I moved out, I could have attended church more often, but didn’t because my family didn’t attend. This was one of my greatest sins at that time in my life. Inconvenience does not eliminate sin. You must find where the line between inconvenience and inability is. I agree with Promethius, talk to your priest and see if you can work something out. It is always worth it to attend Mass, and never worth it to miss it on Sunday or a Holy Day. Do what you can, but if it gets to the point that you just can’t, don’t worry :slight_smile: I’ll pray that your mother takes your conversion seriously and helps you to get to Mass!

Contact the closest Catholic Church and ask if they have a Catholic (s) who live near you who would be willing to pick you up and drive you back from Mass.

I’d gladly do this for you and would greatly enjoy your company and conversation.

there is no sin at all if you cannot get to Mass. Your mother does not sin because she has no obligation as she is not Catholic. You do not sin because when you simply cannot get to Mass there is no obligation.

Welcome! It’s truly a beautiful family that you are joining.

I agree with Leegal-see if you can find someone in the parish that lives close to you and can drive you. It’s a great thing that you are thinking ahead of this responsibility. If you do find someone to help you out, you can always return the favor by mowing their lawn or another little task they may need. It’s all about helping out.

Like Barbkw said, If I lived close, I’d take you myself.

God Bless you for having the courage to seek God and follow him where he leads you.
Welcome Home!

Remember… God asks that we do our humanly BEST… not the impossible. A lack of transportation or money for a child or young adult is a very valid reason to miss Mass if the Church is miles away (like in your case)

Our Sunday time with the Lord Jesus should not be a source of anxiety.

My Advice

If your parents approve…

Perhaps you could find someone at school who is Catholic and tag along with their family to Church?. I’m sure they’d be happy to have ya. However, I know that sometimes our circle of friends may not be the same religion as we are. – So this may not work out.

Be careful about driving in a car, alone, with an adult (other then your parents) even if that adult is a parent of someone you know. Always have your friend or classmate in the car with you.

And again… do this WITH your parents approval. The church would never tell you to disobey your parents if they are concerned for your safety.

Otherwise, do the best you can until such time as you are more independent (have a car, insurance, and a driver’s license.) or move out on your own.

God Bless and wish ya all the best

I think you gave an important piece of advice here. I would not allow my teenage daughter to be alone in a car with an adult I personally did not know and trust, even if it was from a church recommendation. That is no guarantee of their safety. Thank you for bringing this up.

To the OP: Honey, do the best you can until you are old enough to drive yourself to church. You are not expected to do the impossible. Welcome home to the Catholic Church!

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