“A women is free to an orgasm by herself or by her husband within the context of the marital act. It’s a good way for her to feel connected and satisfied if orgasm through the marital act alone isn’t achievable.”
The Magisterium has NEVER taught such a claim. In fact, masturbation and other unnatural sexual acts are clearly condemned by the Church, with no exceptions for the “context” of the act.
The Church’s teaching (Veritatis Splendor) on intrinsically evil acts clearly states that intention or purpose, and circumstances or context never justify an intrinsically evil act.
CCC 2352 By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. “Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action.”
There is no exception to the above condemnation of intrinsically evil sexual acts for the wife, as if she were under a different version of the moral law than the husband, nor for the marital bedroom more generally.
CCC 1756 It is therefore an error to judge the morality of human acts by considering only the intention that inspires them or the circumstances (environment, social pressure, duress or emergency, etc.) which supply their context. There are acts which, in and of themselves, independently of circumstances and intentions, are always gravely illicit by reason of their object; such as blasphemy and perjury, murder and adultery. One may not do evil so that good may result from it.
The “context” of the act of masturbation does not justify the act, because it is intrinsically evil.
There are no magisterial texts to quote or cite saying that the spouse may do whatever they like, as long as there is a natural act included at some point. And it is even more directly contrary to Church teaching to claim that the wife is exempt from sexual ethics and from the Magisterium’s condemnation of masturbation: “A women is free to an orgasm by herself…”
The teachings of Saint Augustine, Saint Thomas Aquinas, and Saint Alphonsus Liguori all clearly condemn sexual acts in marriage that are not both unitive and procreative. Alice and Dietrich von Hildebrand have the correct understanding, in this regard, on marital sexual ethics.
Does anyone really believe that Jesus and the Virgin Mary would tell any married couple that such acts are permissible, let alone good and holy? But what is happening is that sinful secular society and the hedonistic culture have influenced the minds of many Catholics, so that they accept all manner of grave sexual sins, on the basis of ridiculous rationalizations.