Hello everyone. I'm a 21 year old unmarried female who has failed to remain chaste. I was raised Catholic and have been blessed with always having some amount of faith - though at times it's been pretty microscopic.
I started dating when I was 18 and lost my virginity to my first long term boyfriend in college. After we broke up I had a few affairs. During all of this I was away from my faith. About 7 months ago, I reconciled back to the Church and broke up with my second long term boyfriend who wasn't Catholic.
I've now been seeing a man who is Catholic and takes his faith as seriously as I do. He's had similar struggles in the past with chastity as well. We've been in a relationship for three months. We both are extremely opposed to premarital sex but we've faltered three times and actually had sex. The first and second time it happened were about a month and a half ago, separated by a couple of days. After the second time it happened, I was so angry with myself that abstaining for the past month wasn't difficult at all. But then on Friday night, I had a few drinks with him and that's all it took. We completely lost hold of how strongly we're opposed to this! And then yesterday, the regret was overwhelming. This past month, I had been falling for him a little harder and then when we had sex it created such a strong attachment for me. And we have no marriage to reinforce that attachment I feel. But I mean, what did I expect to happen? God intended sex to be this unitive. I'm just really angry at myself and I don't really know what to do now. Obviously, I need to go to confession. Again. But is there any coming back from this for my boyfriend and me? This can't happen again. I thought we had (at least to some extent) overcome this. How do I make sure this doesn't happen again?