Background -- I rarely go to "chick flick" movies but in my life I've seen my fair share. I got burned out on them for awhile, but once in awhile I'll go see one if it's not racy (which is sometimes hard to tell from the previews). If it is, and I'm uncomfortable, I'll look away till the racy scene is over, or joke about it: "TMI! I don't need to see this!" to a friend, etc.:eek:
As for books, I've been reading since I was 3-1/2 and I'll read lots of different genres, fiction and non-fiction, etc., for a lot of different reasons. Having an interest in fashion and cake decorating, sometimes I look at wedding magazines even though I wouldn't myself want an elaborate wedding if the opportunity arose.
It was thus that my eye was drawn to the Bride Quartet series by Nora Roberts, an author whom I'd normally not give the time of day to. I know that "Chick Lit" usually has sexual content, but flipping through these I guess I didn't catch it at first glance. So I start reading the first one. Got it at the library, by the way. And I can tell when a sex scene is about to occur so I flip the pages past it and hope I haven't missed anything important to the plot (I doubt it:rolleyes:).
Now right away I can tell the values are secular regarding sex -- fornication is totally cool, the norm, recreational sex is fine as a substitute for love, though if you are fortunate enough to find someone with whom you can have really wonderful sex with, it can be an indication that you're "in love" and might get married. And typical of this genre whether books or movies, there's indeed the happily ever after wedding at the end.
Here's the point of all the above rambling:
It makes me not only annoyed that there is such an acceptance of that as the "norm," such an expectation that that's how male-female dating, courtship, and marriages occur, but it also makes me confused! :ouch:
How do people with traditional values (provided they can hang on to them in the face of such cultural pressures) ever find each other? How, with the courtship process so tainted, can we ever find a way out of this tangled mess? Can we believe someone is committed to purity in dating even if they claim to be? Not to pick on men, but are there any gentlemen left who will respect those of us who consider ourselves ladies?:confused:
What's the difference between cohabitation and marriage, how do you draw a distinction? Is it all just about a woman wanting to look like a princess for a day?:shrug: :banghead:
I remember when I was an 8-year-old girl, in my cousin's wedding. Now, granted, I can't know what went on in her courtship, but I remember going to visit her and her husband in their first apartment, which they moved to after their marriage. I look back on that, I will always look back on that, as the way things should be. :heart:
Methinks if I want to read any more romantic wedding books I will have to look for ones that are specifically Christian.
It's just something that has always bugged me, and I look forward to comments and shared experiences about the way media has affected the courtship experience and what if any defenses we can have against it.