My husband and I met when we were in middle school, now we are 22 and married. We share different religions I may say, I’m Christian and he’s catholic. Our families are very religious. We decided to get married by civil only to not have no problems with our families or to not argue about what church or religion we will be married by. We do have our days where I want to go to my church and he wants to go to his. But we both support each other. And spend weekends choosing. It’s hard but we make it work. I don’t pressure him and he doesn’t pressure me we both respect our differences. But our family don’t see it like that I have my side of the family asking me when is he going to chance his believes, that two religions can’t be mixed. On the other side his family is very religious but doesn’t bother. What is your opinion ?
While there may be many differences, there aren’t two religions involved here. Catholicism is Christian. As long as someone thinks otherwise then problems will naturally arise. This can be difficult but you both seem to be doing the best as you can with it.
You both are adults ,and married so parents should not interfere in you personal life ,but respect them and give then due respect ,but after you marriage ,you Husband is the head of the family and you both can decide mutually and solve problems.Though you need to get right with God first by Marring in the Church ,since marriage is a sacrament in the Catholic Church ,though may not be for you as a christian of other deno
Matthew 19:6 So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.”
1 Peter 3:Wives, in the same way, accept the authority of your husbands, so that, even if some of them do not obey the word, they may be won over without a word by their wives’ conduct, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 7 Husbands, in the same way, show consideration for your wives in your life together, paying honor to the woman as the weaker sex, since they too are also heirs of the gracious gift of life—so that nothing may hinder your prayers.
 When they become adults, children have the right and duty to choose their profession and state of life . They should assume their new responsibilities within a trusting relationship with their parents, willingly asking and receiving their advice and counsel. Parents should be careful not to exert pressure on their children either in the choice of a profession or in that of a spouse. This necessary restraint does not prevent them - quite the contrary from giving their children judicious advice, particularly when they are planning to start a family.
2231 Some forgo marriage in order to care for their parents or brothers and sisters, to give themselves more completely to a profession, or to serve other honorable ends. They can contribute greatly to the good of the human family.
Ephesians 5:21 Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ.22 Wives, be subject to your husbands as you are to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife just as Christ is the head of the church, the body of which he is the Savior. 24 Just as the church is subject to Christ, so also wives ought to be, in everything, to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 in order to make her holy by cleansing her with the washing of water by the word, 27 so as to present the church to himself in splendor, without a spot or wrinkle or anything of the kind—yes, so that she may be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way, husbands should love their wives as they do their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hates his own body, but he nourishes and tenderly cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, 30 because we are members of his body.[[b] 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.” 32 This is a great mystery, and I am applying it to Christ and the church. 33 Each of you, however, should love his wife as himself, and a wife should respect her husband.
Sirach 25:1 I take pleasure in three things,and they are beautiful in the sight of God and of mortals:agreement among brothers and sisters, friendship among neighbors,and a wife and a husband who live in harmony.
Proverbs 3110 A capable wife who can find?She is far more precious than jewels.11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,and he will have no lack of gain.12 She does him good, and not harm,all the days of her life.13 She seeks wool and flax,and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant,she brings her food from far away.15 She rises while it is still night and provides food for her household and tasks for her servant-girls.
16 She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength,and makes her arms strong.18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.Her lamp does not go out at night.19 She puts her hands to the distaff,and her hands hold the spindle.20 She opens her hand to the poor,and reaches out her hands to the needy.21 She is not afraid for her household when it snows,for all her household are clothed in crimson.22 She makes herself coverings; her clothing is fine linen and purple.23 Her husband is known in the city gates,taking his seat among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them;she supplies the merchant with sashes.25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,and she laughs at the time to come.26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.27 She looks well to the ways of her household,and does not eat the bread of idleness.28 Her children rise up and call her happy;her husband too, and he praises her:
Catholics are Christians. It’s incorrect to suggest otherwise.
Getting married “by civil only” is not a proper marriage for a Catholic in the view of the Church. Doing so to not upset anyone’s parents sounds like a bad start to a marriage if you have to walk that much on eggshells just to practice your Catholic faith.
I was married for 23 years to a Presbyterian but I got married in the Catholic Church and wouldn’t have married him any other way. His family was fine with that and all came to the wedding and his mother and brother were in the wedding. There was also nothing “hard” about it and he didn’t expect me to attend his church and I didn’t expect him to attend mine, although from time to time he would come along to a Mass.
I edited this last part of my post because I was confused, I thought the OP was the Catholic. Since it’s the husband (who is not the one posting) who’s Catholic, and my statement was more meant for him than for the non-Catholic in the relationship, I’ll withdraw it.
Did the two of you receive any premarital counseling or preparation? What happens when children come along? How will they be raised? It sounds like you two could possibly work it out but meddling family might make that difficult.
No problem as far as I can see. My wife was a Lutheran before she converted to the Catholic Faith tradition. I used to go to the Lutheran service as well as Catholic and everything was fine. Like you said it was about respect for each others differences in faith matters. Then one day she said to me completely out of the blue that she wanted to convert and my concern was just for her to be sure about it. The only thing we had to do after her conversion was to get “re-married” in a Catholic setting as we too had been married civilly.
You are both Christians.
If your husband did not get married by following Church law, he needs to talk to his priest about bringing his marriage into the Church. It’s called convalidation. It’s possible for a Catholic to marry a non-Catholic in a civil ceremony, but it requires some paperwork in the Catholic Church. If he didn’t do that, he needs to talk to his priest.
He is obligated to attend Mass on all Sundays and holy days of obligation. He can also go with you to your church, but he must go to the Catholic Church. He can go on Saturday evening or any time on Sunday.
When you marry, you leave your parents. So both of you are going to have to find your way as a married couple and put boundaries on your family if they continue to be uncharitable.
You say you are a Christian and your husband is a Catholic. That is completely wrong. Catholics are Christians, indeed they are the original Christians. I presume when you say you are a ‘Christian’ you belong to one of the many thousands of protestant denominations or a non-Catholic Christian ecclesial community that calls itself ‘non-denominational’.
As a married couple the first thing you should be doing is looking for the common ground such as your common belief in the one, true God.
There is no reason why either one of you should convert to the other’s branch of Christianity. Many married couples have good and strong marriages but go to different churches on Sundays.
It is important to note that unless your husband received a dispensation from canonical form from his diocese the Catholic Church considers your marriage invalid.
It is very important that you resolve these issues before your marriage is blessed with children. If you had married in the Catholic Church your husband would have had to make a promise that he would do all he reasonably could to have your children baptised and educated in the Catholic Faith. The Catholic Church will still expecthim to do this.
Your situation is what it is. It is sad that your family feel the way they do. It would be far better to all look at what you have in common. Take as your starting point your common belief in God. A lot of non-Catholic Christians hold a large variety of misconceptions about the Catholic Church. It would be good for your family to learn in a calm way the truth about the Catholic Church.
I wish you well and will pray for you.
Since you ask, (all links are operational)
The answer is
Do what Jesus said to do
He established only one Church on Peter and those in union with him…correct?
His Church is called [the Catholic Church]
from Acts, 9:31, the Church was called
From the Greek Study Bible
Ἡ μὲν οὖν ἐκκλησία καθ’ ὅλης τῆς
ἐκκλησία = church ,
καθ’ = according to ,
ὅλης = whole / all / complete / universal ,
τῆς = the ,
= the Kataholos Church = the Catholic Church
It is in scripture AND tradition, and the ongoing teaching of the Catholic Church, that a Catholic who deliberately misses mass on Sunday commits mortal sin . Scripture describes that as an obligation.
Therefore, your husband can’t miss mass in favor of going to your service.
Having to debate which church to attend sounds pretty sweet, if that’s the worst of your marital conflicts.
Both Churches are preaching God’s message, quoting the bible.
They aren’t equal.
Only ONE is His Church. The Catholic Church. Only ONE Church is being “in” His Catholic Church.
Yeah, Steve I’m not sure how hammering that home in that style would benefit a marriage. I think a slightly more diplomatic approach would generally work better between spouses.
Never suggested they were equal. But both are preaching God’s word from the same source.
Steve’s right though, and I told my husband this many a time. If my husband had been one to argue over it with me, the marriage wouldn’t have lasted long…actually there probably wouldn’t have even been a marriage.
This notion that ecumenism means Protestant (or other non-Catholic) churches are somehow equal or equivalent to the Catholic Church does not fit with Catholic belief. A strong Catholic doesn’t tiptoe around the issue.
I don’t believe at this point myself that any of them are anything but fanciful notions about things we have no real clue about. However, been a strong Catholic would be rather different than banging out statement that there is only one Church. My wife’s great-grandmother was prone to doing this and regarded the Orthodox Church as the only true Church and viewed Catholicism as Satanic and she sure was not hesistant in letting you know that either. Much to the emberassment at times of her daughter and grand-daughter who would apologize and point out she was a very old lady and they didn’t share her point of view. Myself I found it amusing and didn’t take offence. I sadly only knew her slightly before she died, but a classic line of hers that sticks with me is, ‘Your young man doesn’t seem too bad for a non-Russian, even though he’s Catholic.’ Said to her great-grand-daughter shortly before her death. More annoying is my mum’s surviving sister who will at any and every opportunity start lecturing you about how if you are not Catholic the perils of Hell await you. My father who is a very devout Catholic finds this so annoying that if she calls to the house he goes for a walk. He calls it ‘spiritual terrorism’.
Look at the sources I quoted. Was my name on any of them? No.
When us Catholics do our Profession of Faith every Sunday, we say,
“I believe in one Holy, Catholic and Apostolic Church”. To us, that means the one we are standing in, reciting the Profession of Faith.
I would not call someone else’s religion “satanic” unless they actually do worship Satan. I’m not an extremist.
But as far as I’m concerned, if you’re going to be a non-Catholic and in a relationship with me, I believe what I believe, which is above. I don’t believe in “two Holy Catholic and Apostolic Churches”, mine and the partner’s, nor do I believe that theirs is the One, or equivalent to the One. If the other person wanted to make a “Branch Theory” type argument with me that his church and my church and so forth are all just “branches” of the same One Holy Catholic and Apostolic Church founded by Jesus, I’d say, “OK if we’re all branches, you can just hop over and sit on my branch with me.”
That’s just how it is and how I was raised. I’m a stubborn person anyway and religion is something I don’t back down on. My grands didn’t go through religious persecution for me to cave in because I was afraid of upsetting someone.
As you identify yourself as a current agnostic with some remnants of Catholicism left, I would expect that answer from you.
I would have simply seen that as an opportunity to ask her to prove her belief. That’s how it works.
When you were Catholic,
Do you remember WHY or maybe you never learned WHY, it has always been taught from the beginning, and still taught today, that outside the Catholic Church there is no salvation?
Re: same source
Their source is a bit light. 7 fewer book
Seeing that the NT’s are the same, I don’t see any passage in the NT that says one can divide from the Church Jesus instituted without disastrous consequences