Church advice for career change


#1

Hello,
I am 33 years old and have a very dificult decision to make regarding a recent career change and am looking for some guidance from the church before making a final decision. Here's my dilemma:

I have 3 children and a wife (stay at home mom) to support and could not make enough money at my previous job which I held for 3 years, and could barely pay the bills. This job also made me unhappy but It may have been a result of not making enough money. A few months ago, I went out looking for a better job and found a VERY good job with much better pay and benefits. --Seems pretty easy so far right? :)

I am finding at this new job, I feel over my head and have to spend all of my free time studying and am not confident that i will be able to be successful at it as of now.

My previous employer has offered my old postion back to me with a raise almost equivilant to my current salary. It would be enough to live on but the benefits are not as nice.

I have tried talking this over with my wife, but all she wants me to do is stay at the better company and does not understand why this is a difficult decision for me.

If I can succeed at this new job, it will allow me to be a better provider and give me self confidence which i currently lack. If I cannot do this job and end up getting terminated or moved to a different position It will be VERY hard to get another job that pays comparably right now. We would find ourselves in a bad spot.

I have to give an answer to my previous employer in the next couple of days.

So the dilemma is -- Do I take a chance on the new opportunity (which is a good one) while risking the security of my family or do I go back to the previous employer?

I welcome any knowledge / advice from the church as well as "What I would do is" answers.

Thank you!


#2

First of all, your wife's opinion is the one that matters. We can give advice, but ultimately she needs to be the one you make your decision with.

There is generally a learning curve at any new job. Employers expect this, and most of the time once new employees have had a chance to adjust and showcase their skills and value to the company, it's no longer a problem. It might be helpful for you to ask your supervisor for feedback so that you can get a better handle on whether you're doing a good job- maybe your concern is just self-doubt because you're new, and nothing more. Also ask what you can do better.

It sounds to me like you want to keep your current job, and so does your wife, but that you're afraid of failing at it. They gave you the job- they think you're capable. You also mention being unhappy at your last job. Remember those things that made you unhappy. Do you really want to go back? You must be pretty valuable to your last employer, to make them offer you a substantial pay increase to get you back. Consider this too- don't sell yourself short.


#3

Going back to your old job would be just that: GOING BACKWARD. You should give yourself more of a chance with the new job, and if it does not work out look for something else. My husband found himself in a similar situation years ago, he went back to the old job, with a promotion and nice raise, but unfortunately all the issues that made him leave in the first place were still there and within two years he left (again) just before they were getting ready to let him go. Since you still are the new guy at work, look for someone who can help you out until you get your bearings around the place. Your wife might be worried that she will have to go to work if you start making less.


#4

First off, any advice you receive here is not from the Church. Rather, it is from well-meaning individuals who (mostly) identify themselves as Catholic.

Second, whatever action you choose, your trust should be in God, not in your employer (that goes even if your employer is the Bishop).

With those out of the way, I will offer advice. You say your old employer has offered the same position you had before but at a better wage. Meanwhile, you have expanded your abilities tremendously with your constant studying since taking your new position. You are certainly more valuable than when you left and that merits more than simply a wage increase. Any movement you make should reflect that. If your old employer were to offer a higher position with higher responsibilities, you would really show your value and indeed merit your higher salary. If not, however, you risk a bad situation for both yourself and your old employer. For you, you will be "stuck" in an insipid, if comfortable, position that you will have no real way to advance out of since you would have lost incentive to self-improve. For your old employer, well he will find himself paying more for the same service he received before; when he realizes this, he may well seek to replace you with someone who is willing to accept your old wage.


#5

BTW-
Welcome to CAF. :wave:


#6

Communicate with your new boss genuinely and get the help you need to succeed. Find a mentor or find a good blog in that field that can help you grow. I would graciously thank old boss and tell him there might be a time in the future that you might return but you can't predict. Be enthusiastic with new boss and roll up your sleeves and make it happen. Set small development goals with new boss and revise as frequently as possible to show your advancement, even if babysteps. I was once in your shoes and it took over a year to get up to speed.


#7

[quote="katolsk, post:6, topic:250712"]
Communicate with your new boss genuinely and get the help you need to succeed. Find a mentor or find a good blog in that field that can help you grow. I would graciously thank old boss and tell him there might be a time in the future that you might return but you can't predict. Be enthusiastic with new boss and roll up your sleeves and make it happen. Set small development goals with new boss and revise as frequently as possible to show your advancement, even if babysteps. I was once in your shoes and it took over a year to get up to speed.

[/quote]

Communicating your current struggle with the new boss can be a good idea if it is within the context that you are verifying you are meeting his expectations and are seeking input how to improve. If your new boss expresses doubts about your fitting in, however, it can be a clue for your actions.

Don't tell him your old boss wants you back, though, as it can be easily misinterpreted as discontent with the new position. (be honest if he asks - it is actually quite flattering information for both you and the new boss)


#8

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