Clergy Abuse


#1

I want to help my childhood best friend deal with her bitterness towards the Catholic Church as a result of clergy abuse in her life and her sisters. She made it through life and became very successful in her career as a psychologist but she posts scandalous remarks in Facebook to warn her friends about the Catholic priests.

Not knowing what to do, I began praying for her, offer some sacrifices and go to Adoration for her intention.

How do we comfort her? What books can I send her to start the process of healing for her? What organizations are reaching to the victims of clergy abuse?

God Bless,
Joyn9kids


#2

Each diocese is supposed to have a Victim’s Assistance division to help with the healing process. The Chancellor is usually the one in charge of this. You can start by having her go there.

Second, rage against one priest does not justify lumping everyone into the same category. This is wrong. In fact, it only makes the pain worse.


#3

I doubt that there is ANYTHING you can do. If she was directly effected by abuse, especially the abuse of someone who she trusted, I doubt she will ever look at the church in a different light.


#4

[quote="hellopeople, post:3, topic:192170"]
I doubt that there is ANYTHING you can do. If she was directly effected by abuse, especially the abuse of someone who she trusted, I doubt she will ever look at the church in a different light.

[/quote]

I think this is true. Just keep praying for her. As a psychologist she should understand the role that psychology played in perpetuating the delay in stopping these very sick individuals and yes criminals.


#5

[quote="Seatuck, post:4, topic:192170"]
I think this is true. Just keep praying for her. As a psychologist she should understand the role that psychology played in perpetuating the delay in stopping these very sick individuals and yes criminals.

[/quote]

Although she may be an excellent psychologist, she is clearly not too far on in her own healing journey. Encourage her to seek personal counselling and to pray to God, however she understands God, while continuing to pray for her yourself.


#6

This evening on Raymond Arroyo’s “World Over” program on EWTN, he or this priest pointed out that in some country, maybe Germany, the statute of limitations may be waived for these sex abuse cases, but it seems that they’re make that waiver ONLY for claims against the Catholic Church.

Sex abuse cases in other organizations or contexts are going to have the usual protection of the statute of limitations.

That would, in my opinion, violate the idea of equal protection under the law, that we supposedly enjoy in this country.

Observation: I am surprised that we don’t hear of any reprisals against the priests and bishops, e.g. murder. If someone had sodomized me, I think I’d go back later and “get” them. I don’t know if anything would stop me. It is astonishing that we don’t hear of revenge killings in this regard, in any country.


#7

Don’t count your chickens before they’re hatched.


#8

Hello!

I too was a victim of clergy abuse, at age 14-15 and let me just say now. I want nothing to do with the Catholic church or any other organised religion for that matter. I don’t hate religion or blame all priests/brothers or whatever else for anything that happened to me, it’s just that every time I hear or see anything religious, it takes me back to the time when it used to happen and it’s like I have to live through those awful years all over again. You’re friend will never get over what happened to her. She can get all the help she wants, but this is something we have to carry for the rest of our lives. I think the best thing you could do for her is be there for her. Listen if she wants to speak about it. Don’t take offence to the things she says, she’s entitled to her feelings after what was done to her. Just let her know that you don’t like the facebook comments and maybe she could stop that for your sake. As long as anything you say to her doesn’t undermine what she went through or make her feel like you are telling her to ‘get over it’. This stuff is a heavy burden to carry and it’s not something that can just be forgotten about. Unfortunately when a wolf in sheeps clothing takes advantage of you, you soon learn to be weary of all sheep. I wish you both the best. Take gentle care of the both of you. Just don’t push anything.


#9

All dioceses/eparchies have Victim Assistance Coordinators, assuring victims that they will be heard. In 2009, $6,536,109 was spent on therapy for the victims of clergy sexual abuse. All dioceses/eparchies have Safe Environment Coordinators who assure the ongoing compliance to the Charter for the Protection of Children and Young People. Bishops are meeting with victims. Dioceses/eparchies have Healing Masses, retreats for victim/survivors and other reconciliation events. The Church is doing many things to help the victims!

mercatornet.com/justb16/view/6879/


#10

[quote="helorpot, post:8, topic:192170"]
Hello!

I too was a victim of clergy abuse, at age 14-15 and let me just say now. I want nothing to do with the Catholic church or any other organised religion for that matter. I don't hate religion or blame all priests/brothers or whatever else for anything that happened to me, it's just that every time I hear or see anything religious, it takes me back to the time when it used to happen and it's like I have to live through those awful years all over again. You're friend will never get over what happened to her. She can get all the help she wants, but this is something we have to carry for the rest of our lives. I think the best thing you could do for her is be there for her. Listen if she wants to speak about it. Don't take offence to the things she says, she's entitled to her feelings after what was done to her. Just let her know that you don't like the facebook comments and maybe she could stop that for your sake. As long as anything you say to her doesn't undermine what she went through or make her feel like you are telling her to 'get over it'. This stuff is a heavy burden to carry and it's not something that can just be forgotten about. Unfortunately when a wolf in sheeps clothing takes advantage of you, you soon learn to be weary of all sheep. I wish you both the best. Take gentle care of the both of you. Just don't push anything.

[/quote]

Hail Mary, full of grace.
Our Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
pray for us sinners,
now and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

Saint Agatha, pray for helorpot

Sorry to resurrect old thread


#11

Those laws have already been made in the US. They were very specific to NOT include their public school systems (where ongoing sexual abuse dwarfs anything that ever happened in the Catholic Church).

bostonglobe.com/metro/2012/05/31/limitation-child-sexual-abuse-complaints-may-extended/CdtgMuueUwIYs6iPbmFJnJ/story.html


#12

***** This original post was from two and a half years ago so the original poster may be unlikely to read any responses given *******


#13

I know I just wanted to make sure I said something to that person:o


#14

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