My sister lives with her boyfriend, neither of them believe in marriage. Our daughter is 2 years old and absolutely loves her Aunt who is only 22. They get along so well, but she brought up one day that she wants to take our daughter home with her to hang out. I said sure without thinking about it, what do you guys think? My daughter is way too young to understand anything anyway, and they aren’t openly affectionate in front of her or anything.

Nothing wrong with visiting a Aunt imo.

At two years old, there’s not much knowledge or experience there yet, but later, questions will come up.

The problem with a man and woman living together without benefit of marriage was looked down upon when the current incarnation of the idea received a big push in the late 1960s. Christian parents reminded their children at the time about what they were taught, but a few didn’t listen. They rejected their parents and their Church and thought they were “free.”

In the 1970s, the media helped push immoral living. In the 1980s, they pushed a little more. In the 1990s, more. Today, too many think cohabitation is no big deal. That it’s normal or average. It’s not. Never was.

That two year old will need to hear the truth at the proper time. She will need to hear it. If not, the cycle of people abandoning their beliefs and living like pagans will continue - including among Christians. No, you don’t have to abandon your relationship with friends and even relatives who get into wrong thinking like cohabitation is OK. Pray for them.

It is time to reform the culture, to remind others what real love is. Cohabitation with sex is not the situation men and women were meant for. Though we are all sinners and fall short, we must do good.


My DD is much younger than her cousins, almost all of whom lived together before marriage. She grew up knowing they did AND why we thought it was wrong. Many of her friends also co-habituated. She never did. A few weeks before she married, she told me that she and another friend, who married around the same time but also did not live with her BF before marriage, we’re had a discussion in which they not said how glad they were they had waited until marriage.

She has since pointed out to me how many of her friends who had lived together before marriage are now divorced.

You cannot shield your DD from knowing that sin exists; it’s much better to expose her to it on your terms so that you can explain why if is wrong.

Tough question.

To say no, may create hard feelings with a sister you otherwise love.

To say yes is to condone her immoral relationship.

Eventually the 2 year old will grow up and then it has to be explained that it was OK to treat the Aunt and NON-uncle as family, when really they are not family in the eyes of God. How does that teach the importance of marriage?

Actions have consequences. If there are no consequences to non-marriage, how can we claim marriage is important?

Yet we are called to love and to be patient with those who have difficulty in living up to a Moral Standard. But I don’t think we are called to approve of it by acting as if it is OK.

Tough question. I’d talk to a Priest.

Thank you for all your responses, I think the best course of action is to pray for my sister. I will allow our daughter to be around her, when she does get to an age where witnessing this behavior will cause a problem I will explain to her why her aunt is wrong and doesn’t know it.

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