I should change my handle to "disgruntled college student". As you may or may not know I am having some serious issues concerning things I am experiencing as a college student in regards to my faith and Christianity in general. It's now coming to a head and I'm seriously considering just giving up on getting my AA degree. I was reading some of the other threads concerning other faiths and how much we should tolerate whatever those beliefs entail. I agree with what posters have said about charity etc. but now I'm hitting a wall as it were in regards to what my soul can tolerate. I am a very sensitive person when it comes to matters of my faith. I am tough as nails otherwise but if someone messes with my belief in God and the church it feels like they are literally bludgeoning me and the Lord for no good reason but just for the satisfaction of utter hatred. Here's my latest scenario: I finally got accepted into an Honors English course after 2 yeas of waiting. It's a lovely course full of good literature and open discussions however, I am starting to get the same feeling I had in my history course-that is that God is under attack and that I should just leave.
There is this young man who sits right next to me. (I can’t change seats because I am in a wheelchair) and at every opportunity makes it known that he is a proud Atheist who is not going to tolerate any mention of spirituality or anything that even “hints” at having a relation to religion even if it is relevant to the text we are reading or to the discussion that is being led.
Even when the word "faith" was used as an alternative to "trust" for another human being, he went into a tirade and would not let up until the teacher apologized for the usage of the term in the reading we were doing! This person who wants their beliefs to be respected has absolutely no tolerance for anyone Else's beliefs because Atheism has taught him that he is "enlightened" to the folly of believing in "fairy tales" and "lies" and that those of us who do believe are intellectually stunted. I am starting to become enraged by this person and their attitude. I think people should be free to have whatever opinion they want but should exercise restraint when in a room with others who may not share their opinions. I do try to understand that bad experiences with religion in general sometimes leads people to choose to believe in nothing. I can definitely sympathize with just giving up when all you have seen and experienced is so negative and stereotypical. I have been to some churches where what they were preaching would scare you into a stupor-so I can understand when someone who is feeling manipulated by certain christian practitioners would choose to reject God altogether however, I don't understand the seething hatred that Atheist some times exude. I wish I knew what to think about all this. I feel like the enemy is just dogging me no matter what I do in regards to school and at the same time I wonder if God just wants me to leave and devote my energies to something else. I wonder if it is even right for Catholics to attend college at all (except for catholic run universities) I would love to go to a Catholic college but can't consider it until I have my AA because I didn't do well enough in H.S. to get accepted. What would you do? I did write to the professor ,as has now sadly, become my custom, I don't know what if anything she will do to rectify the situation. Other than that I'm stuck. I want a higher education so badly. It is a dream that I have had all my life but I wonder if its just not a dream meant for me.
Take Care Mary M.