Coming closer to God and increasingly fighting sexual sin/urges?

This is really beginning to frustrate and sadden me.

I’ve found myself coming increasingly closer to God, and in more recent times I’ve possibly been the happiest I’ve ever been. I’ve been praying my rosary, praying a decent amount and offering up personal prayers and intentions for others too as well as reading the Catechism and Bible.

But what I’ve increasingly found difficult is that the more I spend time involving in building up my faith and spending time involved in faith activities, I’ve also found myself increasingly tempted into sin,

Now as anyone who has seen my posts regularly, one of the biggest issues I have has been surrounding sexual sin. I have over the years struggled to deal with my sexuality and how it has affected my relationship to God. It is likely my biggest weakness.

It’s almost like someone/thing is deliberately trying to stop me from being faithful to God, to try and break my relationship with God by tempting me. What’s worrying me particularly is that some of these temptations have been things where ordinariy I wouldn’t have been tempted.

Any ideas what I can do to help the situation?

Pray the rosary every day and stay close to Our Blessed Mother. :slight_smile:
I will be praying for you!

This means you are doing it right. The closer we come to God, the harder the devil tries to defeat us.

Problem is that some of these urges are really quite disturbing, and often so strong I feel like giving in.

How disturbing are we talking? Because I am LITERALLY going through the same thing.

I just started reading St. Augustine’s Confessions to help me curb my weakness in that area. He had great struggles with issues of the flesh. I am hoping that it will give me strength. My wife and I practice NFP, and live chastely when we must abstain, but we both struggle with temptation. The rosary has been a blessing to both of us. Temperance is a difficult virtue to master.

If you are really wanting to know, PM me. I really don’t want to mention it here if I can avoid it.

Your flesh and brain have been wired more towards sex and lust as the world see’s it, and now that you are coming to find God your mind is trying to go down two different paths, trying to distinguish between love and lust. This was a problem for me also, but just know that it will get easier and you will come to find that yes God did create sex for our greater good and that spirit is willing and the flesh is weak. I’m currently in a Theology of the Body class and if you would like greater light on the subject I would recommend An Introduction to the Theology of the Body: “The Language of the Body” on or if you like to read there is a condensed Theology of the Body book called Men, Women, and the Mystery of Love by Edward Sri. This book offer’s insights from John Paul II’s Love and responsibility.
Sex is a wonderful and beautiful thing as long as we know how to treat it and respect it.

The most important thing I found in the healing process is continual trips to the confessional. This allows us to die to our self and open ourselves up to God’s guidance whenever we find ourselves committing sins of the flesh for this matter of sexual sin. Just remember “Less of me, more of Jesus.” I am sure if you pray and just give the room for Jesus to work in your life you will find that these temptations are only as strong as you allow them to be. Another thing that helps is whenever we are tempted to remember that Jesus suffered the scourging on the pillar, especially for sins of the flesh.

I will be praying for you friend, this is perhaps one the most difficult sins to overcome. With the graces of God and constant visits the the sacraments of confession and holy communion, know that you will be able to overcome these temptations with the love of God and you will be victorious and much happier. Being able to understand the spiritual bodies the Lord has given us and how they are to be used properly will open up so many new doors for you.

Another thing that helped me was telling myself “I want to choose to live a chaste life”. Whenever I told myself “No! Don’t think about her sexually or what not” I only found myself repressing the feelings until they eventually erupted out of me. We must choose to want to live a chaste life with God and remember to avoid the near occasion of sin. God bless and good luck!!

i was in the same case. though i really do not know you and the sin you are saying, if its comfortable for you to say it through PM please PM me.

in the same way, i experienced that. and would say that the closer we come to God the more the devil wants to destroy us. i would relate to you one thing happened to me.

During holy mass, i told Jesus. This mass i offer for reparation of all of my sins and of the whole world.
then some minutes before the Holy Communion, severe sexual thoughts entered my soul that it tortured me so much. I was not to receive Him but i told my self “it is for the Love of Jesus and i didnt gave in, i fought it. So while i was walking towards the priest, i received greater temptations that even looking at the priest, i saw him naked! even all the people i see around me is naked and seems to do impurities. i didnt gave in and received Jesus and told Him. For the love of You and for the world.” after communion, i received such peace that it didnt haunted me again for the whole month.

sexual temptations are like dogs on leash. if you dont play with them, they wont bite you. all they can do is to bark.

:slight_smile: i believe i can help you more if i know what is the real problem. There are many sexual sins.

Hah! What a great analogy. :thumbsup:

just got it from my spiritual director :smiley:

Kouyate, I wonder if you have ever heard of Ignatian Spirituality or the Spiritual exercises of St.Ignatius of Loyola? This site I’ve linked to below has excellent talks on it by Father Tim Gallagher. Just listen to the talks (about thirty I think)- Maybe one or two everyday. Even if it’s just to learn something more about Catholicism- I honestly think that it may benefit you, whatever else you do in terms of faith from now on. It may sound a bit boring in the first mp3, because it’s the introduction, but believe me, it’s very, very profound throughout yet simple and wise all at once. Just trust me on this, listen to it.

You struggle a lot when it comes to identity issues and life decisions (like Faith)- This wisdom is designed precisely for these struggles- knowing the path to walk, even in little things and big things (like how to live happily with our own sexuality). I hope it helps you.

Here it is:

St Teresa of Avila tells us that as the soul moves closer to union with God, evil forces will step up their actions to do everything in their power to tempt us and stop us uniting with God. My guess is that you are probably being plagued by both human doubts and evil forces as you try to move closer to the Church.

Feel free to PM me if that would help at all. I’m a young British Catholic also struggling to discern sexuality and struggling with sexual purity :o

Same here, I can’t seem to get past a couple weeks without falling down. I can echo every word of the OP’s words.

I know what you are talking about OP! When I came back to the catholic faith, I started sinning sexually as I hadn’t in years. It was so scary, I had no idea why this was happening.

I’ve gotten through it but it’s taken LOTS of hard work, prayer, learning, support, etc. Dont’ give up–there HAS to be something of Satan in these increases in attacks when we return to the church. But we have Christ on our side so we can have victory.

Also, I second Mary’s recommendation of the Fr Gallagher talks. I just stumbled across them two days ago and they have helped me SO much in understanding this spiritual battle and what to do.

God bless you in your journey.

I also struggled with increased sexual temptations when I came back to the church. It was quite scary. It’s taken a lot of work, prayer, learning to overcome, etc but I feel I’ve gotten through the worst of it.

Do not give up. Satan clearly attacks some of us in this area because he wants us to turn back. Learn how to fight back in Christ. The talks Mary mentions above by Fr Gallagher are excellent. I’ve just started listening to them and they help explain the struggle and how to get through it.

God bless.

Great advice! I’ve experienced similar issues as stated by the OP and others in this thread, as I guy who does and has counceled several other young men I surmise we all deal with this on a regular basis. I for one contend with many sexual tempations on a daily basis and as my faith life has increased so have the temptations.

Saint Augustine is one of the best Saints to read into as far as such issues are concerned, he has helped me a great deal. Frankly I don’t think that anyone’s perverse temptations are new or worser than anyone else’s, I know I deal with a lot of messed up stuff in my own mind every hour of every single day.

If you would like advice, someone to talk to, or anything else feel free to PM me, that goes for anyone that reads this message.

Thank you everyone, you’ve been incredibly helpful!

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