Concerning hate


I am filled with hate towards a certain person. I keep saying in my heart “I hope you suffer a lot, and then die”.

This person has repeatedly injured me, specifically in a way that has impeded my health, studies and education.

I know that supposedly, nothing happens outside of God’s will and He has a good plan for me etc. etc. but right now my faith is barely there.
I’m suffering from some physical injuries that this person has inflicted on me, just before I’m supposed to move abroad to start grad school.

Need lots and lots of prayers.

Thank you


@petitefleur , may you receive the healing you need . :smile:


The Lord calls upon you not only to forgive, but to pray - without reservation and from the heart - for that person. He desires the salvation of both of you.

A point to ponder: Before we desire anyone to burn in hell, it is best to remember that the only way we can gloat over their suffering is to be in hell with them!

Prayers ascending.


:pray:t2::pray:t2::pray:t2: For you and your situation


Talk to a priest about the hate in your heart. Don’t let it fester.


Praying so you can give up this person and the painful memories attached to him/her!
Reason why to forgive - do you really want someone who hurt you that badly that close to you (like in your heart)?
No I don’t believe all that happens to us comes from God. I haven’t found this ideas expressed literally by any holy father. What they rather say and what the church teaches is that we can dedicate all that happen to God and we can remind ourselves that this life and this world are not eternal. If we dedicate it all to God then evil (supernatural-the devil, natural-people who don’t wish us well) has no power over us.
Let go of that person. If they are family if you let go of him/her than when you come back from college seeing that they can’t hurt you anymore they will have no choice than to just stop or find other amusements for their cruelty. If it’s not family then it’s farewell-hope-I-never-see-you-again-bye-be-gone-where-are-you-because-you-don’t-exist-for-me.
I pray for you!


In other words - you hate God - as he tries to teach you patience !
Saints - considered it an honor - to suffer for Christ - esp. the martyrs.
Your go to - is prayer - KEEP telling God about it !
Hide behind God’s leg - and point the person out -
He’s our Father - big brother and protector -
Stay in prayer. I know. It’s tough :innocent:

9 He that saith he is in the light, and hateth his brother,
is in darkness even until now.
10 He that loveth his brother abideth in the light,
and there is none occasion of stumbling in him.
11 But he that hateth his brother is in darkness, and walketh in darkness,
and knoweth not whither he goeth, because that darkness hath blinded his eyes.


Hi, I found healing for me just saying something like ‘Jesus I can’t pray for him/her right now, I can’t forgive him/her yet. I put him/her and my pain in your Sacred Heart. Help me’


I hope no one advises you to feel ashamed of that hatred. You sound completely justified in hating this person.
This will take time. Lots of time. Patience. prayer. Patience Prayer.
I send my best wishes and I say a prayer for you right now.
Take care.


Another point to ponder: Some saints have said that if you saw your own mother sent to hell you’d be filled with happiness because you would know that God’s justice was being done.


Don’t let hate consume you. It can destroy your health, both physically and emotionally as you may well know. Try to forgive this person and pray for them.

I understand that this can be an extremely difficult thing to do. But remember in doing so, you are not condoning their actions towards you. Rather forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.

My prayers are with you.


Really? I don’t think this is from God and how is this person “suffering for Christ”? Being slapped around by someone is not coming to the defense of faith, it’s being abused.

To the OP, the standard advice really applies here. Get out of the situation as soon as is possible. Forgive this person as much as you can when you can, not for him but for you. This does not mean forgetting. Your eventual forgiveness lets you rise above this person and there is noting worse for a bully than to lose control over you.


You must forgive if you want to be forgiven.

Matthew 6:14-15
“If you forgive others their transgressions, your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your transgressions.”

I know that forgiveness is hard sometimes. But it is the right way to go. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you’re no longer upset, it doesn’t mean you’ve forgotten about it, it doesn’t mean you think what they did was okay. Forgiveness means not wanting to get justice or revenge yourself, but you leave it up to God. Forgiveness is about loving (not liking) the one who sinned against you. I know it is hard. But Jesus died for them too. God loves each of us, even those of us who commit horrible, evil deeds toward Him and others.

Do you have a pardon crucifix, or are you able to invest in one?

Another note: Our misfortunes aren’t necessarily part of God’s plan for us. Sometimes, bad things happen simply because we live in a broken, fallen world. God may allow things to happen but that doesn’t necessarily mean it is what God wants for you.


I should be feeling the same. I believe I was unfairly sacked from a job I had been doing for ten years. I never had a day of sick, I did a lot of the jobs other people afraid to do, caring for people with challenging behaviour and learning disabilities.

So, to help me forgive and overcome my anger, I have done about two thousand hours of voluntary work for the people who sacked me. I still continue with this voluntary work now. I have probably given them about £15,000 of my time at minimum pay. Every now and then, I come into contact with the people responsible for my sacking.

But I cannot explain the profound sense of peace that I feel, it is beyond money. I say this, it is easier to do two thousand hours of voluntary work, than to hold onto anger for seven years.

My belief is, that the person who is able to forgive, gains more than the transgressor who is forgiven. I believe it is important to forgive, even if the other person does not say sorry.

Holding onto anger eats away at you. Anger is like picking up a burning coal, with the intention of throwing it at the person who angers you, and the person who gets burned the most is you. The longer you hold onto the burning coal of anger the hotter it becomes.


You MUST forgive because if you died in this state of mind with these thought toward this person your soul would be in grave danger. PLEASE know that the ONLY person you are hurting with this hatred is yourself, it is doing NOTHING at all to the other person. The other person may not even know what caused you to have these feelings toward them so they are going on with their life. HATE can kill the heart, mind and soul. PLEASE let it go. Ask God to give you the grace to do so.


If you have been physically assaulted, call the police.

Regarding hate, you will come to find that your hate never has any effect on the object of the hate. It is you who will burn from the inside out with it until you are nothing but ash. Let it go, it isn’t worth it.


I don’t agree with this statement - God does not create evil to teach us anything. She does not hate God, she hates the evil person who physically hurt her. Physical abuse is never deserved.


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