Confused


#1

Okay so my dad doesn't have a job and he asked me if I could lend him some gas money so I did and I gave him 30 bucks. The thing is he's been unemployed for more than a year and it doesn't look good at all. He doesn't live with me but about an hour away. Today he drove up here and I gave him money. My brother and sister hate him because all he does is mooch off of others and is very irresponsible with money. My older brother says that our dad is like his kid. But anyway I was wondering if what I did was a good thing to do. I need advice.

I also need advice regarding my sister. She gets angry so easily!!! There was a letter from our health insurance that came in and said my sister's insurance needed to be renewed. She needs health insurance to continue college (and she doesn't live with me either) and I didn't give the paper to her soon enough and now it's too late but I think they are offering an extension. She and my mom got into an argument and for some reason she got mad at me. So today she told me to go to where my dad lives because she has some stuff that she needs to be picked up. I kept questioning her about what kind of stuff and the she said whatever and the conversation ended.(I didn't want to go because she's also really controlling and spoiled and I hate doing what she asks me to do) When my dad was coming up today I told him to bring whatever she needed to be picked up. He asked my sister what it was that she needed to be picked up and she said "I have no business there". I'm so confuse guys I don't know what to do. Every day I'm hating my family more and more all they do is cause me stress and I don't know what to do anymore. I need some advice.


#2

What you do for the least of Mine, you do also for Me - a paraphrase of Jesus advising us not to turn out backs on those who need help.

This economy is not our fault, and it sounds like you are limited in your ability to help, but you are moving in the right direction for your father. If he is 55 years or older, he quilifies for subsidized rental units, where his rent is based upon his income, to the level of zero rent if necessary. Contact the local Welfare office or HUD office where he lives. Get the number and address and voluteer to drive him there to fill out the applications. Check on food stamps at the same time. Sometimes there is a waiting period of a year or more, so the sooner he gets on the list the better. Meanwhile, the family should not leave him on the streets if he goes homeless, but all you can do is inform them of this, this would rest with your mom, and aunts/uncles (if you have any). Recall the 2nd decade of the Joyful Mystery of the Rosary, THE VISITATION, where the Virgin Mary went to and took care of Her cousin Elizabeth. Every day, say that one decade, the Visitation, requesting the intercession of the Mother of God on behalf of you dad.

Secondly, this is a time of testing for your father. Jesus “humbled Himself” to take on flesh and become man for our sake. This is the time for your father to remember that if Jesus can humble Himself, your dad can do likewise, and he needs to get a job doing whatever is available to provide for himself. This is not the time to say “I am a _____” and wait for that job to return. Now is the time to say, I will do anything, and do it with thanksgiving that God has given you a source of income.

Anger and frustration is in many families during this terrible economic testing of our nation. Your sister is no exception. Do not respond to her anger with anger. Try to be a source of love, quietly. Help her where you can, but pray for her continuosly. Simply repeat the “Jesus” prayer for her. “Jesus and Mary have mercy on ( insert her name)”.

Raise your entire family up in prayer before God, asking for His intercession on each of them according to their needs.


#3

I don't know how much value you place in what Protestants know as the Apocrypha, but the following passage is one reason why Catholics hold to it the way we do:

Children, pay heed to a father's right; do so that you may live.
For the LORD sets a father in honor over his children; a mother's authority he confirms over her sons.
He who honors his father atones for sins;
he stores up riches who reveres his mother.
He who honors his father is gladdened by children, and when he prays he is heard.
He who reveres his father will live a long life; he obeys the LORD who brings comfort to his mother.
He who fears the LORD honors his father, and serves his parents as rulers.
In word and deed honor your father that his blessing may come upon you;
For a father's blessing gives a family firm roots, but a mother's curse uproots the growing plant.
Glory not in your father's shame, for his shame is no glory to you!
His father's honor is a man's glory; disgrace for her children, a mother's shame.
**My son, take care of your father when he is old; grieve him not as long as he lives.
Even if his mind fail, be considerate with him; revile him not in the fullness of your strength.
For kindness to a father will not be forgotten, it will serve as a sin offering--it will take lasting root.
In time of tribulation it will be recalled to your advantage, like warmth upon frost it will melt away your sins.**

~Sirach 3:1-15~

Emphasis mine.


#4

if your father isn’t old or frail, don’t give him money. if he has any addictions, don’t give him money. from 2 Thessalonians 3:10:

For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.

abusing charity is a sin.

the sister thing, who knows what’s that about. if you don’t live with them, find lots of useful stuff that keeps you busy and relatively unavailable. do charitable works, work more hours, study more, go to church more etc.

sounds like your family is in some turmoil. ask God to help you find ***peace ***in your own work, prayer, silence, rest and charitable works.


#5

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