Confused!


#1

Alright. So, spiritually, I feel lost and confused. I feel that I should become a priest, but yet I am still afraid to go through with it. At times, I felt like I was being called, then they vanished. I deeply wanted a Bible for Christmas, and my grandpa had gone out and bought one for me. In it, he wrote "To the best grandson anyone could ask for", every time I look at this, I succumb to tears because I feel that my grandpa wants me to be religious. Heck, I'm tearing up now, haha. I just don't know what to think of my life, yet I can't think of it any other way. Being a priest is a huge responsibility, and I don't know if I can accomplish it. I'm not confirmed, either. Is being confirmed a requirement for becoming a priest? I am baptized, though. I'm just very lost right now. I also don't want to bring it up to anyone I know personally, because I usually confide everything within myself. I would just really appreciate some input from others.


#2

Hello!

I’m also discerning a vocation at the moment for the priesthood, and yes, it can be complicated at times, but it’s probably best not to overthink it too much, or it will drive you nuts! Go with what your heart is telling you. Do you see youself fifteen years from now celebrating Mass or having a wife and children?

Here are the signs of a vocation:

The following is a list of some of the ordinary indications of a vocation, taken principally from the works of Father Gautrelet, S.J., and the Retreat Manual. No one need expect to have all these marks, but if some of them at least are not perceived, the person may safely say he has no vocation:-

  1. A desire to have a religious vocation, together with the conviction that God is calling you. This desire is generally most strongly felt when the soul is calm, after Holy Communion, and in time of retreat.
  1. A growing attraction for prayer and holy things in general, together with a longing for a hidden life and a desire to be more closely united to God.
  1. To have a hatred of the world, a conviction of its hollowness and insufficiency to satisfy the soul. This feeling is generally strongest in the midst of worldly amusement.
  1. A fear of sin, into which it is easy to fall, and a longing to escape from the dangers and temptations of the world.
  1. It is sometimes the sign of a vocation when a person fears that God may call them; when he prays not to have it and cannot banish the thought from his mind. If the vocation is sound, it will soon give place to an attraction, through Father Lehmkulhl says: “One need not have a natural inclination for the religious life; on the contrary, a divine vocation is compatible with a natural repugnance for the state.”
  1. To have zeal for souls. To realize something of the value of an immortal soul, and to desire to co-operate in their salvation.
  1. To desire to devote our whole life to obtain the conversion of one dear to us.
  1. To desire to atone for our own sins or those of others, and to fly from the temptations which we feel too weak to resist.
  1. An attraction for the state of virginity.
  1. The happiness which the thought of religious life brings, its spiritual helps, its peace, merit and reward.
  1. A longing to sacrifice oneself and abandon all for the love of Jesus Christ, and to suffer for His sake.
  1. A willingness in one not having any dowry, or much education, to be received in any capacity, is a proof of a real vocation.

Some online quizzes that you can take:

catholicdoors.com/news/discern.htm
dioceseofsalford.org.uk/priesthood/how-do-i-know-if-god-is-calling-me-to-be-a-priest?start=1
albanyvocations.org/signsandqualities.html
foryourvocation.org/upload/vocation-quiz.pdf

This website has helped me in discernment:
vocation.com/

I hope that the above links help you! Remember to pray, pray, and then pray some more!
Remember our Savior’s words: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.” - Matt. 7:7-8

God bless you in your discernment.


#3

Haha for the first quiz, I was thinking since the first couple didn't really apply to me and I thought, "Maybe priesthood isn't for me." Then I finish the quiz with 10 checked off, and when 3 was supposed to be good, I laughed to myself. Maybe I am overthinking this.


#4

[quote="Mrmawker, post:3, topic:244275"]
Haha for the first quiz, I was thinking since the first couple didn't really apply to me and I thought, "Maybe priesthood isn't for me." Then I finish the quiz with 10 checked off, and when 3 was supposed to be good, I laughed to myself. Maybe I am overthinking this.

[/quote]

Trust me...I overthink things all the time. I checked off all 16 of them, and then I went back to make sure I just wasn't checking things off, and I said, "Nope...this probably is what God wants me to do." :D My initial reaction was, "Woah!? Did I just check all those off?" I still don't know why I'm second guessing myself. :shrug:


#5

Ugh.. I haven't gone to church in a while. Its because of a bad thing too. I really liked this girl once, and she made fun of me said that I was homosexual, which was weird, since I felt an attraction to her. But then, she went out with two of my best friends and drove them both away, although I am friends with the last one again. For a point, I thought I had finally gotten over her, then I saw her at church as a girl altar boy. I was so embarrassed I haven't gone to mass since. Its been months. She has really scarred me.


#6

[quote="Mrmawker, post:5, topic:244275"]
Ugh.. I haven't gone to church in a while. Its because of a bad thing too. I really liked this girl once, and she made fun of me said that I was homosexual, which was weird, since I felt an attraction to her. But then, she went out with two of my best friends and drove them both away, although I am friends with the last one again. For a point, I thought I had finally gotten over her, then I saw her at church as a girl altar boy. I was so embarrassed I haven't gone to mass since. Its been months. She has really scarred me.

[/quote]

Do not stay away from church just because of her. Hold your head up high. The Lord doesn't want people straying from His Church. Here's some thought: "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." - Jer. 29:11.

The first thing I would recommend; however, is to find a good priest and confess your sins. As you know, missing Mass without good reason is a sin, so you must receive atonement for your sins before you receive Holy Communion. "Yet even now," says the LORD, "return to me with your whole heart, with fasting, and weeping, and mourning; Rend your hearts, not your garments, and return to the LORD, your God. For gracious and merciful is he, slow to anger, rich in kindness, and relenting in punishment." - Joel 2:12-13

When you say she "drove them away", what do you mean by that?


#7

She influenced them by insulting me and told them to insult me too. I don't know how she did it, but I know that what she did wasn't holy. Frankly, I think the depression brought upon by her was reason enough to avoid her. I tried to avoid her my freshmen year, and I ended up having a class with her. Hated it horribly. Then, this school year second semester, she would always be in the hallway I have to go through to get to class. She is with her current boyfriend in his arms, and I just feel so much anger from it.


#8

[quote="Mrmawker, post:7, topic:244275"]
She influenced them by insulting me and told them to insult me too. I don't know how she did it, but I know that what she did wasn't holy. Frankly, I think the depression brought upon by her was reason enough to avoid her. I tried to avoid her my freshmen year, and I ended up having a class with her. Hated it horribly. Then, this school year second semester, she would always be in the hallway I have to go through to get to class. She is with her current boyfriend in his arms, and I just feel so much anger from it.

[/quote]

That is indeed truly sad. The best thing that you can do with her is to avoid her and to pray for her. This girl seems to be in dire need of prayer. It may be hard at times to avoid her (as you state - having classes with her and crossing her in the halls), but it's worthy to note that YOU are the better person in this situtation, and you NEVER let ANYONE tell you otherwise. No matter what people may say or try to make you think otherwise, YOU are the better person, and always remember that.


#9

I just don't know. I want to be a priest in the diocese in my hometown, but what if she steps up and asks for communion? I am a fragile being, and I am not perfect. No, far from it. I just devoted part of my life to her for a while, and to see her stomp on it like that killed me inside. I just don't want to think that she'll be there later in life. But moving on from this, do I have to be confirmed to go to a seminary or become a priest?


#10

[quote="Mrmawker, post:9, topic:244275"]
I just don't know. I want to be a priest in the diocese in my hometown, but what if she steps up and asks for communion? I am a fragile being, and I am not perfect. No, far from it. I just devoted part of my life to her for a while, and to see her stomp on it like that killed me inside. I just don't want to think that she'll be there later in life. But moving on from this, do I have to be confirmed to go to a seminary or become a priest?

[/quote]

Honestly, if you get ordained a priest, more than likely you will not be worrying about something that happened in high school when you've gone through six to eight years in the seminary. Yes, the memories of the past will come back to you and bring all the emotions and hurt back up, but you will be able to move on from that easily. More than likely she will have moved on from it as well - maybe she will have started a family and "grew up" so to speak.

Anyways, yes, one must be a confirmed Catholic to be qualified for the priesthood.


#11

I have received communion, and was in religion classes up until 5th grade. How do I get confirmed now that I stopped taking the classes? Its been roughly 5 years.


#12

[quote="Mrmawker, post:11, topic:244275"]
I have received communion, and was in religion classes up until 5th grade. How do I get confirmed now that I stopped taking the classes? Its been roughly 5 years.

[/quote]

You will have to contact your local Catholic Church and tell them your situation. More than likely, with parental consent, they will sign you up for RCIA sessions, which normally begin in the late summer/early fall, so, CALL NOW! Through this process, you will be taught what you missed in grades 6-8 leading up to Confirmation. You will learn about Church history, what each Sacrament is, and most importantly, what Confirmation is all about.


#13

Interesting. Nervous now... Haha. Aren't adults in that aswell?


#14

[quote="Mrmawker, post:1, topic:244275"]
Alright. So, spiritually, I feel lost and confused. I feel that I should become a priest, but yet I am still afraid to go through with it. At times, I felt like I was being called, then they vanished. I deeply wanted a Bible for Christmas, and my grandpa had gone out and bought one for me. In it, he wrote "To the best grandson anyone could ask for", every time I look at this, I succumb to tears because I feel that my grandpa wants me to be religious. Heck, I'm tearing up now, haha. I just don't know what to think of my life, yet I can't think of it any other way. Being a priest is a huge responsibility, and I don't know if I can accomplish it. I'm not confirmed, either. Is being confirmed a requirement for becoming a priest? I am baptized, though. I'm just very lost right now. I also don't want to bring it up to anyone I know personally, because I usually confide everything within myself. I would just really appreciate some input from others.

[/quote]

Many of us feel called to the priesthood(Cahtholics,that is)at one time or another.Especially if we've been away from the Church for awhile.I would guess you're just one of them.People with actual vocations who really do become priests usually don't doubt it for long.When they do take the step their confessiors in most cases can discern if they are actually called or they just think they are.


#15

[quote="Mrmawker, post:9, topic:244275"]
I just don't know. I want to be a priest in the diocese in my hometown, but what if she steps up and asks for communion? I am a fragile being, and I am not perfect. No, far from it. I just devoted part of my life to her for a while, and to see her stomp on it like that killed me inside. I just don't want to think that she'll be there later in life. But moving on from this, do I have to be confirmed to go to a seminary or become a priest?

[/quote]

I'm not sure what the law is, but go ahead and get confirmed in any case. Then it won't be an issue, and you will have strength from the sacrament.

That said you sound quite young, as if you are in high school, and also quite hurt still from this broken relationship. I've been there, felt exactly the way you describe. You just need to stay away from her and give yourself time and space to heal. Love can feel like it's forever, and the hurt of lost or betrayed love can also feel like it will last forever. Maybe it does on a deep, subtle level, but the acute feelings will gradually subside and no longer be a torture. That's my exprience at least.

Go off to college or seminary. Let her go off to college. The chances of both of you being in the same town in a decade I assume would be incredibly remote, and if it happens you might not even recognize each other. And if you do, well you'll have had years of healing and moving on under your belt and it won't be a big deal.


#16

[quote="Mrmawker, post:13, topic:244275"]
Interesting. Nervous now... Haha. Aren't adults in that aswell?

[/quote]

Yes. I know that my parish has something called "Teen RCIA", so I don't know if your parish has this or not, but I guess that it would be nice to have something like this for people your age.


#17

[quote="Mrmawker, post:11, topic:244275"]
I have received communion, and was in religion classes up until 5th grade. How do I get confirmed now that I stopped taking the classes? Its been roughly 5 years.

[/quote]

Does this mean you are in 10th grade? You don't even have to decide what colleges to apply to yet. Take your time! Grow in your faith and life, get confirmed, stay open to wherever God may call you to in the future.


#18

[quote="valentino, post:14, topic:244275"]
Many of us feel called to the priesthood(Cahtholics,that is)at one time or another.Especially if we've been away from the Church for awhile.I would guess you're just one of them.People with actual vocations who really do become priests usually don't doubt it for long.When they do take the step their confessiors in most cases can discern if they are actually called or they just think they are.

[/quote]

Just one of them...? Am I not really called? Ive had confession before. Do you really think I'm just a person who thinks he is called, but really isn't?


#19

[quote="CatholicZ09, post:16, topic:244275"]
Yes. I know that my parish has something called "Teen RCIA", so I don't know if your parish has this or not, but I guess that it would be nice to have something like this for people your age.

[/quote]

Yeah.. I am baptized by the way. I just need to be confirmed. It looks like RCIA is just for people who haven't been baptized and are converting to the church.


#20

[quote="Aelred_Minor, post:17, topic:244275"]
Does this mean you are in 10th grade? You don't even have to decide what colleges to apply to yet. Take your time! Grow in your faith and life, get confirmed, stay open to wherever God may call you to in the future.

[/quote]

A college? I thought a seminary was a college. Also, for other things, I don't know what I should do, yet I only see priesthood.


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