Confused


#1

Hello all! I am a 20 year old practicing Roman Catholic. I was away from the church for about a year and I happen to come back on Divine Mercy Sunday. I went to confession of course. Through the course of the year, I’ve went through a lot of things, messed up a lot with school and my job. I have anxiety and its really not nice. I am planning to visit my doctor soon. Anyways, I am now working and going to school to get my basics done at my community college. I also want to get involved with the youth at my parish, as a catechist and I also want to form a youth group, since we don’t really have one. I feel called to do this, like this is what God wants of me. I’ve always had an idea of going to the seminary as well. Of course, every Catholic should be open to the religious life. Anyways, I guess the main problem is that I have this girl, and I really like her, its almost been 7 months. The thing is, she wasn’t used to me going to mass and what not. Yes, we’ve had premarital sex several times but not anymore. I’ve broken up with her twice already but she keeps staying in my life. I know I’m putting her through so much. Its just for some reason, I guess I feel like I shouldn’t be with her, because I mean she is Catholic, but she doesn’t practice. She seems open to it, but I was taught not to missionary date, to change someone. But I really like this girl and Im just confused. I’ve really tried to break up with her, but she won’t let me go, or maybe I won’t let her go, I don’t know. I’m at a loss here. I constantly pray about it and I try to trust in Christ Jesus. I just want a devout Catholic woman that is going to help me raise our children Catholic, if my vocation is to marry. Anywho, any advice and prayers are welcome. Thank you and God Bless.


#2

I'm a hypocrite for saying this but some spiritual direction with a priest might be very beneficial. I've been putting it off myself I suppose out of pride but I know it will help. Can't hurt and its probably going to be easier to get help in person. I'm twenty one and find myself asking many of the same types of questions.


#3

[quote="Mlacobie, post:1, topic:281757"]
Hello all! I am a 20 year old practicing Roman Catholic. I was away from the church for about a year and I happen to come back on Divine Mercy Sunday. I went to confession of course. Through the course of the year, I've went through a lot of things, messed up a lot with school and my job. I have anxiety and its really not nice. I am planning to visit my doctor soon. Anyways, I am now working and going to school to get my basics done at my community college. I also want to get involved with the youth at my parish, as a catechist and I also want to form a youth group, since we don't really have one. I feel called to do this, like this is what God wants of me. I've always had an idea of going to the seminary as well. Of course, every Catholic should be open to the religious life. Anyways, I guess the main problem is that I have this girl, and I really like her, its almost been 7 months. The thing is, she wasn't used to me going to mass and what not. Yes, we've had premarital sex several times but not anymore. I've broken up with her twice already but she keeps staying in my life. I know I'm putting her through so much. Its just for some reason, I guess I feel like I shouldn't be with her, because I mean she is Catholic, but she doesn't practice. She seems open to it, but I was taught not to missionary date, to change someone. But I really like this girl and Im just confused. I've really tried to break up with her, but she won't let me go, or maybe I won't let her go, I don't know. I'm at a loss here. I constantly pray about it and I try to trust in Christ Jesus. I just want a devout Catholic woman that is going to help me raise our children Catholic, if my vocation is to marry. Anywho, any advice and prayers are welcome. Thank you and God Bless.

[/quote]

You are correct, "missionary dating" is a really bad idea. When you say she won't let you go, what does that mean? Does it mean she won't accept a break-up and keeps pursuing you? That's a red flag. I am very glad that you have stopped being intimate with her. Obviously you have bonded the way a husband and wife would, even if it's just the first stages of that type of physical bonding, it is VERY powerful. I think if you have plans going forward, you should tell this girl that you are not ready for a serious relationship at this time, and that you are discerning what you vocation is. Have you told her that you might be called into the seminary? Now, don't toy with women if that is the case. If you really feel a calling, then cut her off now, and don't pursue any more dating relationships. Give yourself time to really understand what God wants for you. You can't do that if there's a girl pursuing you.

Have you talked to a priest about your calling to seminary? Go as soon as possible. You can get more information and if the Holy Spirit is calling you to a vocation, you will continue to get more messages that you can't ignore.


#4

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