So, last week my wonderful girlfriend and I got engaged. Prior to this, I felt 100% certain about my vocation to marriage. I had considered the priesthood in the past, but these thoughts would always disappear. A few days before proposing, I started worrying that I might be disobeying God by getting married if He is actually calling me to be a priest. Now, I do have a respect for the priesthood and don’t see it as being impossible that I could be a priest, but when it comes to thinking about my future, what will bring me joy and what will be best for my soul, and when I look at the course of my life, marriage makes the most sense and (I know this is not necessarily the right approach) it’s what I desire the most, not just for my sake but for the sake of my future wife and children. Thinking about these vocations questions has been very stressful because I keep going in circles, justifying my decision to get engaged, demonstrating to myself why these worries aren’t necessarily a call from God, and then going back to the start to make sure, just in case I’m trying to fool myself. I feel like I’m not truly attracted to the priesthood but merely thinking about it out of a worried obligation to do so because I don’t want to disobey God.
When it comes to me and my fiancée, things are amazing. She is the woman of my dreams and has so often challenged me to be a better Catholic, and amazed me by her faith and knowledge. When I think about what attracts me to marriage, an important part is the duty to deny myself to serve her and (God willing) our children.
It came to my mind that, given my complete certainty about my vocation to marriage, the fact that I had these worries right before proposing could be an indication of a temptation away from my vocation. So, to get to my question, is it possible that these thoughts could be temptations from the devil? Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated!