Catholic women friends: What keeps any of you gals going out there who are in marriages less than happy? not headed for divorce court or anything, but not happy? where you have a husband that doesn’t “really” love you like you wish he did? or that is is unable to? I know I’ve mentioned perhaps in a similar post certain specific problems in my marriage, etc., but I’m talking in general now. There is no real case for divorce, no abuse or abandonment, or affair, specifics are getting ironed out, just in general I don’t think my husband loves me. Guess at first, there were warning signs that I didn’t heed, the way he was, and is.
I remember once at a party when we were dating, before we ever were married, he paid me no attention, rather went off, oggaling at one of his friend’s sister.!!! Then we married, got instantly pregnant, and now we just do what we need to, but I feel so unloved. He never kisses me or hugs me, is cold, distant, and in a fog half the time. He’s said many times, he “never should have gotten married”, etc., that he “hates being responsible for anybody”, etc., etc. But we have our family, which is generally happy, it’s just me. The counselor we saw asked if he wants to continue in the marriage, and he said YES. Out of duty I think.
We have seen a Christian counselor several times about some details, but in general, this is how it stands. NO amount of counseling can make someone love another or change.
What comforts you wives who have endured the same thing? Any Saints? anything you could tell me? outside interests? Being “unhappy” is a lousy excuse for divorce. I try so hard to BE loving, but am so lonely every day, there’s no emotional connection 80% of the time. Is this how all marriages become after so many years? How to you get along in a unloving marriage, with a spouse who doesn’t love you or know how??? Tell me!
Would appreciate some thoughts. Thanks. And God Bless You All.