Could you please tell me how to stop masturbation,. please

Hi. Unfortunately i’m guilty of the sin of masturbation… How can i get rid of this disgusting habit? i have tried the following, but it hasn’t worked:

Confession … i confess this sin every week.
Pray the rosary
Read the Bible
Attend mass.
i also work out.

However, i’m still guilty of such sin. Please tell me what can i do to get rid of this habit? i’m a guy in my 20’s , i have never been with a woman. I would like to read answers from guys who quieted this habit, and who are in their 20’s and have never been with a woman.

thank you
God bless you.

I can give a piece of advice. When you feel tempted, pray Psalm 50(51) which is a prayer or repentance and purity. Also, it might buy you some time for the initial hormone excitement to settle a bit.

Unto the end, a psalm of David, When Nathan the prophet came to him, after he had sinned [committed adultery] with Bathsheba.

Have mercy upon me, O God, according to Your great mercy; and according to the multitude of Your compassions blot out my iniquity. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. For I am conscious of my iniquity; and my sin is at all times before me.

Against You only I have sinned, and done evil before You: that You might be just in Your sayings, and might overcome when You are judged. For, behold, I was conceived in iniquities, and in sins my mother conceived me.

For, behold, You have loved the truth: You have manifested to me the hidden and unrevealed things of Your wisdom. You shall sprinkle me with Your hyssop, and I shall be purified: You shall wash me, and I shall be made whiter than snow. You shall make me to hear gladness and joy: the humbled bones shall rejoice.

Turn away Your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities. Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit in my inward parts. Do not cast me away from Your face; and do not remove Your Holy Spirit from me. Give me the joy of Your salvation: and uphold me with a directing spirit. Then I shall teach the transgressors Your ways; and the ungodly men shall turn to You.

Deliver me from blood, O God, the God of my salvation: and my tongue shall rejoice in Your righteousness. O Lord, You shall open my lips; and my mouth shall declare Your praise. For if You desired sacrifice, I would have given it: You do not take pleasure in burnt offerings. The sacrifice of God is a broken spirit: a broken and humbled heart God shall not despise.

Do good, O Lord, in Your good pleasure to Zion; and let the walls of Jerusalem be built. Then You shall be pleased with sacrifices of righteousness, offering, and burnt sacrifices: then they shall offer calves upon Your altar.

I’m about your age, and I’m still a virgin. I’ve had experiences with women, and masturbation as well in the past. Let me tell you, the desire for you to stop is the most important and foremost step. I used to be addicted to it as well, but now I’m able to control it, and it’s a beautiful feeling. I’ve gone from being obsessed with masturbation to taking a vow of celibacy (hopefully on the road to priesthood soon).

Addiction to masturbation is usually a result of pride or lack of self-esteem. What you need to do is practice fasting and temperance (ie, self control from other things). Try fasting once a week (especially now during Lent). Fridays are a mandatory fast without eating meat, but you could also fast on another day (Wednesday is popular) with something else; give up your favorite drink or meal, take a cold shower, consume only bread/water for the day etc). The point of this is to rid yourself of luxury and sloth; ie, detach yourself from the world and the worldly desires, which helps you also practice self control and denial in regards to masturbation.

Also, be specific in your prayers. When you pray, really connect with God and ask Him to help you. Turning to our Virgin Mother Mary is usually a good idea for strength over sexual sins; she knows what it’s like to live celibate and under sorrow. When you feel tempted, close your eyes and meditate for a moment on her sorrow. Close your eyes and say aloud “Jesus, Mary, and Joseph”. It gives you strength.

It is also important to remember purity. To stay pure means to keep a clean heart from all evil thoughts or desires. Bad things lead to more bad things. If you go out, drink, watch a rude film, swear, get into feuds with people etc, you’ll be a slave of sin which will tempt you to only sin even more. This calls for a lifestyle change. Let go of your pride or ego and don’t argue with people; keep a good relationship as well as you can. Do something for someone else out of charity; don’t gossip or swear, don’t follow stupid modern day celebrities or shows that are just furthering you from your spirituality.

Obviously, you need to help yourself though. Don’t look or think about sexual things, they’l just drag you straight back down into temptation again. Keep your mind and your activities occupied with sensible things; keep busy with another hobby and keep your mind off sexual lust. If you find that you get tempted somewhere commonly, avoid that place or activity. If you see an attractive girl, remember that she has just as many faults or blemishes as anyone else, despite the way they portray themselves. If you find you’re getting tempted by talking to or seeing other girls, then simply distance yourself from them and don’t get caught up in their cry for attention. You’ll also notice this makes them respect you even more, not that you should use that as an advantage. Try to think about girls from a more personality-based view, think about what kind of person they are, what they like, their faults, their strengths etc. Don’t just judge them based on appearance.

If anything, you should do it for yourself. Masturbation is poison to your mind; it creates a sexual desire within you that burns in everything you do. You’ll find that you constantly get tempted by attractive women which will hinder your ability to hold a steady conversation or relationship with them, seeing as your mind is focused on lust. It distracts you in other things as well. Take it from someone who’s been down that road before; women can be trouble, especially when you fall for the trap of the ones who like to present themselves sexually.

You need to realize that there is a world of glorious spirituality out there. When you connect with God and receive His grace, you experience something that can’t be matched by anything else, and the only way to experience this is to love Him completely. Rely on God and throw yourself upon Him. Be motivated by His Love and righteousness. Another helpful tip; attend mass as often as possible (not just on mandatory Sundays). Try to go to mass as many times as possible after you have confessed your sins. Receiving the Eucharist gives you strength and it heals your wounds. Trust me!

It gets easier after you break your cycle of habit. After a couple of weeks, it becomes much easier as you go on, believe me. When you see the world from a different perspective, not blinded by lust, you’ll be much more motivated. God certainly has some glorious plans for you, you just need to obey and surrender yourself to Him! Ask Him to Help you on a personal level, and follow His word in other areas as best as you can to give you strength and training in obedience. You can’t do it without God!

Take a look at this as well, it has some very helpful facts and tips to consider.

I will keep you in my prayers. God Bless!

There is a 12-step program called Sexaholics Anonymous. Search for them on the Web.

Dear Brother,

I will speak from my own experience to try and help you, but since this is my experience and not yours it could be different, so just ponder this and take it with a grain of salt…

Find a regular spiritual director, not just a “confessor” that you go to for a 3 minute sacramental absolution, but a priest (preferably) that you can sit down with for an hour a week and completely bare your soul…and I mean BARE YOUR SOUL, holding back absolutely nothing. Become accountable to him and put yourself under his obedience. The relationship between a spiritual parent and child is completely unique and unlike any other; your spiritual father will have special insights to help you along the path towards salvation. As I said, become obedient to him, and do as he says, but in the meantime remember that all our passions are connected with each other-when you give in to one, you build up all the rest. I think some of the best advice I’ve ever received when dealing with sins of the flesh -within and without the confessional- is to fast. Not in the “starve yourself” kind of way, but for the sake of moderation, especially on Wednesdays and Fridays. And it goes without saying to avoid meat on Friday…it’s weird to wonder what food has to do with masturbation, but once again, all the passions are interconnected. And finally what I’ve had to learn is this: there are many things I can so to strengthen my will, the Rosary, daily Mass, fasting, vigils, spiritual reading, on and on, but at day’s end, I have to have the determination to just say “no.” Even scream the word out loud if I have to. I have to make my body and my mind obedient to my will. This is hard. This is painful. But it’s the road to salvation.

And finally, learn to have disgust for your sins and your sinfulness, but to love yourself at the same time. Always trust in God’s mercy and compassion-it’s His greatest attribute. Don’t despair of hope; I’m an 18 year old guy who just came into Holy Church last September, and I’ve had to confess things much worse than to generally say “masturbation,” but God’s love is everlasting and he offers us so much help when we try to find the way of repentance.

Okay…so remember that I’m a poor sinner; everything I’ve said is from my experience and my point of view, so weigh it with your conscience because it comes from me and not the Holy Ghost. But I do seriously suggest that you seek a spiritual father to help you along your way.
If you wanna talk privately, you can pm me, I’ll try to figure out how to read it :smiley:

Peace, my brother, and prayers for you

Tobasco. :eek:

Actually, after many many moons of struggling with this myself, what finally did it was becoming Catholic. I actually HEARD with my own ears from Christ’s priest that I was forgiven. And I wanted to show him how grateful I was by not doing it again.

Adopt Mary as your protector. Get a Miraculous Medal and hang it around your neck. I have a cheap chain that pulls the hair on my chest. Irritating, but it’s a constant reminder that it’s there. Pray to her. Ask her to watch over you. When you really realize that Jesus’ own mother-a woman- is watching you, it really helps.

Learn the Anima Christi and recite it when you are tempted, even if it means when you are using the toilet. I know that almost sounds sacrilegious, but really it’s the alternative that is.

Fasting works well for me as well. I’ve noticed that even when I’m having a lot of trouble with attractive women in my life and with various pictures on the internet I am still able to avoid the sin even if I’m in the middle of a bad week.

Also, I love that psalm, Zekariya. I say it before every confession I make. I may try your advice too.

CHAPTER 13 – On Resisting Temptations [The Imitation of Christ]

So long as we live in this world, we cannot remain without trial and temptation: as Job says, “Man’s life on earth is a warfare.” We must therefore be on guard against temptations, and watchful in prayer, that the Devil find no means of deceiving us; for he never rests, but prowls around seeking whom he may devour. No one is so perfect and holy that he is never tempted, and we can never be secure from temptation.

Although temptations are so troublesome and grievous, yet they are often profitable to us, for by them we are humbled, cleansed, and instructed. All the Saints endured many trials and temptations, and profited by them; but those who could not resist temptations became reprobate, and fell away. There is no Order so holy, nor place so secluded, where there are no troubles and temptations.

No man can be entirely free from temptation so long as he lives; for the source of temptation lies within our own nature, since we are born with an inclination towards evil. When one temptation or trial draws to a close, another takes its place; and we shall always have something to fight, for man has lost the blessing of original happiness. Many try to escape temptations, only to encounter them more fiercely, for no one can win victory by flight alone; it is only by patience and true humility that we can grow stronger than all our foes.

The man who only avoids the outward occasions of evil, but fails to uproot it in himself, will gain little advantage. Indeed, temptations will return upon him the sooner, and he will find himself in a worse state than before. Little by little and by patient endurance you will overcome them by God’s help, better than by your own violence and importunity. Seek regular advice in temptation, and never deal harshly with those who are tempted, but give them such encouragement as you would value yourself.

The beginning of all evil temptation is an unstable mind and lack of trust in God. Just as a ship without a helm is driven to and fro by the waves, so a careless man, who abandons his proper course, is tempted in countless ways. Fire tempers steel, and temptation the just man. We often do not know what we can bear, but temptation reveals our true nature. We need especially to be on our guard at the very onset of temptation, for then the Enemy may be more easily overcome, if he is not allowed to enter the gates of the mind: he must be repulsed at the threshold, as soon as he knocks. Thus the poet Ovid writes, “Resist at the beginning; the remedy may come too late.” For first there comes into the mind an evil thought: next, a vivid picture: then delight, and urge to evil, and finally consent. In this way the Enemy gradually gains complete mastery, when he is not resisted at first. And the longer a slothful man delays resistance, the weaker he becomes, and the stronger his enemy grows against him.

Some people undergo their heaviest temptations at the beginning of their conversion; some towards the end of their course; others are greatly troubled all their lives; while there are some whose temptations are but light. This is in accordance with the wisdom and justice of God’s ordinance, who weighs the condition and merits of every man, and disposes all things for the salvation of those whom He chooses.

We must not despair, therefore, when we are tempted, but earnestly pray God to grant us his help in every need. For, as Saint Paul says, “With the temptation, God will provide a way to overcome it, that we may be able to bear bear it.” So, let us humble ourselves under the hand of God, in every trial and trouble, for He will save and raise up the humble in Spirit. In all these trials, our progress is tested; in them great merit may be secured, and our virtue become evident. It is no great matter if we are devout and fervent when we have no troubles; but if we show patience in adversity, we can make great progress in virtue. Some are spared severe temptations, but are overcome in the lesser ones of every day, in order that they may be humble, and learn not to trust in themselves, but to recognize their frailty.

My priest gave me that suggestion. :thumbsup: I know that my problem is being in the moment with hormones rushing. It helps to have a prayer of good length to give your body some time to calm down before doing something that you will regret based on your hormonal excitement. :slight_smile:

:thumbsup::thumbsup::thumbsup: I also highly recommend praying the rosary daily.

I cannot offer a great deal of advice except that which helped me.

I developed a “visual prayer”…After all, if we can “visualize” toward lust - why not “visualize” away from it…
So I prayed, “Father, take me to the foot of the cross”, and then began thinking, visualizing myself there. Gazing on the scene of the one who died for my sins.
Hot, dry, dusty day.
The foot of the cross buried in the ground.
The wood of the cross stained black from blood and sweat.
The feet of our Lord.
Filthy and stained and dripping blood and sweat.
I did this - I put Him there - Not alone - but I helped.
Every time I sin, it is increases His pain.
If I refrain, it eases His pain.
Feel the heat of that day, the dryness of the air.
How thirsty He is…
…and so on…

How could I possibly sin while standing at the foot of the cross.

As a corollary to the idea of our sin putting Him there, consider how his cross is the accumulation of our sins. Each time we sin, the cross gets heavier…Each time we resist sin, the cross gets lighter.


I got a lot of flak for saying it on this forum. But I think if you have any issues on this you should speak to to a doctor. Masturbation is normal and healthy and that is why you have the urge. There is no more to it than that

That’s an awesome idea, JRKH! :thumbsup:

What you have said is contrary to the teachings of the Catholic Church. The OP wants help to stop not an excuse to continue. Maybe you could give him advise on quitting since that is his desire.

I appreciate that it is against Catholic teachings, but my advice on quitting would be the same - there is no reason too. It is normal and he will end up mixed up or confused if he believes that a normal human behaviour is somehow wrong. My own view is the Catholic church should not get involved in something like masturbation. It just seems absurd that they do.

But, the OP wants to quit. It shouldn’t matter what you or he believes. The fact is that his desire is to quit. Why not give him advice to help him fulfill his desire to quit?

How do you know it is normal human behavior?

Let’s keep on topic. This isn’t the Apologetic Forum. :slight_smile:


Look, I was raised a catholic, I get it, the whole is there or is there not a god, No one can prove it and no one can disprove it, but seriously, come on people, this is the 21st century do people really think that masturbation is anything other than normal human behaviour - really. Are we still that backward? Apologies all round, but seriously!!

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