Hi all! Just wanted to get some opinons, encouragement, advice, etc. from those who practice NFP.
I’ve been charting since May (Creighton Method) and because I’m still breastfeeding my readings have been all over the place. We have only been able to safely have marital relations 5 times since I began charting and hubby isn’t very happy with our situation but he’s not pressing me to do anything artificial either so that’s a good thing.
My teacher said that after I began menstrual cycles again I’d have many more dry days. Well, my first cycle finished over 2 weeks ago. According to my teacher I have to count any mucus as fertile now (I was a yellow stamper for pretty much the last 3 months) and use a white baby stamp. I had an appointment the first week after my period ended and told her that I’ve had the same kind of all over readings like before. She said we’d have to wait until I went through at least one more cycle to get a better feel for what’s going on with me but in the mean time continue to use the white baby if I see any mucus readings.
Well, I’ve had 6LPC, 8CKL, 10CKL, every day. Most of the time I’m at a 6PC or 8C then I’ll get one or 2 more fertile readings. I’ve not had a dry day since I got stung by a bee in July and took benadryl to reduce the swelling…and that’s the only dry day I had since I began to wean the baby.
Hubby isn’t all that great when it comes to SPICE. He’s not even read the book we were given at the first class.
Basically we’re frustrated (DH even more so) and although he’s never ever pressured me to do something I’m not comfortable with, I can tell that he’s not happy that he can’t have his wife again for weeks or months at a time. We had to abstain for my entire pregnancy because of an incompetent cervix. It’s not like he’s not used to waiting for me…but it’s not easy for a man to resist temptations when his wife is not safely available. We have 4 children already in a single room (we have a 2 bedroom home). Our circumstances prohibit us from moving, we signed a rehabilitation agreement 3 years ago that binds us to our house for 15 years or else we owe back 30,000 dollars…we didn’t even pay that much for our home! Our income is less than $25K a year so trying to build a room or two in our house is impossible, we’re barely squeaking by. Risking having another baby right now is just not going to happen.
Our situation is hard enough as it is and not being able to come together as a married couple to share a way of escape together is really burdening us. We’re in marriage counseling right now and even our therapist (who also taught NFP) agrees that we’re in a pickle. He’s trying his best to help us but when your husband isn’t willing to live in a sexless marriage, well…it gets a bit stressful for me. DH has a LOOONG way to go to learn how to be intimate and loving without being sexual.
So has anyone gone through this? DH even talked about a vasectomy, something he adamently refused to do in the past but now it doesn’t seem so bad to him. The NFP teacher, therapist and me keep saying it won’t be long until I’m in a good pattern with dry days, etc…It’s discouraging though.
Any words of wisdom from Creighton followers?