Crush Advice a meeting at adoration


#1

Ok, so im divorced from an emotionally abusive man. When I left I felt God telling me that He will now be my Spouse, gentle and loving. So I got this ring and a priest blessed it and i wear it on my wedding finger basically feeling as if I only wanted to be with God the rest of my life. And I am considering this making a vow of chasity. The problem is this. I go to adoration the same time each week. During this time the same man goes every week. Weve said hi and such and something about him I like. I like him being there with me. I am so shy around him I dont even look at him when I leave. But im sure he wouldnt even think twice because I wear this ring. But I feel torn because I love God like He is my husband and maybe I will even make a vow to him. Just not sure what to do with these new feelings that have come about. At the same time I would have a hard time taking the ring off.


#2

Before you even consider dating you need to have your marriage investigated. If found valid your choice is made for you, proceed with your vow of chastity. If your marriage is found invalid there would be no harm in seeing if things with this gentleman may lead somewhere.


#3

My marriage has been annuled


#4

Good to know. I’d pray about it then, and maybe take steps to get to know the man better e.g. saying more than hi. You may find that the crush wears off when you get to know him better. If it doesn’t God may be calling you to marry again.


#5

I have a hard time taking the ring off though the one on my wedding finger that was between me and God. Should I just take it off at adoration? I dont know. I guess I need to know my calling better. Celibacy or be open to another relationship. Lately the verse has been mulling over in my mind…he who joins himself to the Lord is one in spirit with Him. I want to do that just not sure how or which way to go. I guess I just need to rest and pray.


#6

Don’t get too far ahead of yourself; he may already be married or engaged, and just a friendly person. You don’t really know anything about him.


#7

The real issue here is that you are not sure if you want to try to find another man or just dedicate yourself to the Lord going forward.

I agree, you do have to just take your time and pray over it.
You haven’t made any formal vow to the Lord, such as taking a religious vow to join an order where you would be a “bride of Christ”. The Lord also understands that you may not be sure what you want really, because you had to overcome this bad situation in the past.

I do think, however, that it’s going to be hard for you to do Adoration properly if you’re thinking about a man you see there. Consider changing your Adoration time so you can focus on Jesus and not the man. Consider speaking to the man elsewhere (perhaps he attends Mass at your church?) and at that time you might also be able to see if he is married or engaged, for example if he brings his wife or fiancee to the church.


#8

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