The papal tiara (the three-tiered crown) is on display in the Vatican Museum. Given the size of the place that’s like saying you can see it in Delaware, but if you ever go visit the place you can find out it’s exact location and let the rest of us know.
As for your other questions, check out this essay by Fr. Dwight Longenecker:
Viva Christo Rey – Long Live Christ the King!
FWIW, I think so long as what you say is said in love and kindness, and you have asked G_D to have you say it as such, then although it may be painful only good will come of it. We should not run to embrace martyrdom, but we should be willing to welcome it with open arms when it comes.