I really need some councils.... because i don't think that i've ever received a smart one. I'll introduce myself first : i'm a 40 years old french (sorry if my english's not perfect). I've been journalist during most of my life and now i'm press-relation of a politician. I've been a lot involved in a really traditional catholic movement, i married someone in 2001, and a son two years after, and she divorced 3 months after his birth. Even if it had been a huge chock for me, until this divorce nothing really amazing. I have always believed that i was made to live in family. So, after a few years, and even if i didn't have a nullity of marriage, i was with another girl, Helen, from Atlanta GA. Three years after, during the summer 2008, we were in France. She'd moved there in june to "definitely live" in France. But she came with only a back-bag and a 3 months Visa. She was a little too much boheme, and i thought that, even if i was loving her, we weren't rich enough to afford such a life where she wasn't searching a job or a way to have a normal life in France. I wasn't happy to tell it to her, because i truly love Helen. But i had to say that, because i had to be serious for my son. Helen wasn't happy about that neither. Three days before her return plane date, she bought a pregnancy test and... was pregnant. She'd never forget nor forgive that i have would to "fire" her during this summer 2008. But she was still continuing to come on internet every day. It was impossible for me neither to let her. She was there, never said that she'll come back, but stayed there and stucked me on internet even if i'd told her that i wouldn't become a "virtual dad". Madeleine Grace is born on April 27 2009, and... i continued to be online with her. So i became what i wouldn't become virtual dad. Icouldn't insist too much or she was yelling. I just stayed online to watch them through skype like some others are watching TV. I didn't have money to travel, and i couldn't have vacations without my son. So it was two tickets to pay if i would go to Lauderdale (where she'd move) and it was just impossible. During the same time i changed of work to earn more money (journalist is a good job in France, you're very well considered but... almost not payed). That's how i began to work for politician, because i would earn more to propose to Helen some solutions.
At the beginning of 2010, i was stable and could see the future better. A friend of mine gave me a plane ticket and we agreed that i'll come during the two last weeks of may 2010. Before that, since the begining of the year, Helen was turning histerical with me, insulting me and inventing bizarre stories about me, the same kind of some girls who are going through a divorce (she invented that i had other girlfriends, that i would my daughter because i'm pedophilian or to earn some money by french government). When i arrived in Lauderdale in may 2010, i saw in real Madeleine for the first time and you can imagine my emotion. Helen was insulting me every day during the first 6 days. Then one night she told me that she would marry me ; will come to live in France for Christmas (2010) and that she'll come to France during the summer. She also asked that she would me to buy a ring, a bigger flat, and to find a job for her as teacher. I went back to France, searched a ring, took a beautiful flat, and i also found a teacher job at a higher level than the ones she had in Florida. All that in one month (it was easier because i was already earning 200% more than in 2008). Helen was known as someone gentle, by me as well than by friends... And someone catholic. And two weeks before arriving to France, she told me that she'd never ordered things she had order : wedding, flat... She denied all. She told also that she'd found a new job in a better school... In despite, she came to France and stayed one month there during last summer. She was living with me like a married woman, but she'd never accepted to have one conversation about making a family. In fact she never did since 2008. She ordered a wedding, but never accepted a conversation about family or future. Every time i tried to say one word, every time she turned furious. And, as i told, Helen is not known as an hysterical person. She left France in mid august and almost immediately re-began to insult me every night online ! She stopped totally the conversations in late october. Since that, almost one year from now, i can't see my daughter (except a few times in march). Helen once or twice a month is now coming online during 5mn with my mom. So all is not cut. But she can't communicate with me. That's not the first time. As she can't make it rational, she's inventing some reasons against me, as i explained before.
My daughter Madeleine is more than 2 years old now, and she can't be with her dad nor her brother nor the rest of her french family. There is zero plan to make things better. It's very cruel for me to be far from her. My son and my family are sad also, of course. It's terrifying for my son to have had to live that (he is 8 now).
Helen sometimes said that she was ok to go to see a priest or a catholic familly councillor, but never did it. She promised... but never did.
You can easilly imagine what it is for me to have lived those year with an "online baby", to have met my daughter and lived with her during last summer... to be called "dad" for the first time of my life (my son is calling me "papa" of course).... and be deprived of her without knowing if i'll see her again before years and years...
I'm still in France, and even if i earn more money, i can't pay some plane tickets for me and my son to the US for every vacations... and anyway i have zero contacts anymore.
I've always thought that with the help of God, Helen will clear her mind and begin to face her responsibilities, as she is catholic...
I really need help...
Thanks in advance,