Dealing with worry


#1

Does anyone else struggling with a lot of worrying? Would you say that it is because of lack of trust in God? I noticed when I decide to trust God on something and to HOPE in prayer, I feel much less worried.

But on a day to day basis, I worry a lot. I really want to work on that. For example, I second guess everything… earlier in the day I phoned someone and left a message… and then spent half an hour wondering if something I said sounded weird on the answering machine. :rolleyes: I don’t even know why! it’s so silly sometimes. I worry about a lot of things like that… like what people think, etc. Does anyone else? If so, how do you fight that??

God bless :slight_smile:


#2

I am a constant worrier too, but I worry about things like: mom has alzheimer’s, what happens if she has to go into nursing home and needs a feeding tube? The decision has to be made by me. I ask God to help me take care of her finances in a responsible manner. I worry about my daughter who lives in Amsterdam and travels alot. Those are my daily worries and when I go to Mass in the morning I ask God to help me do his will and to put myself in His Hands and do the right thing for my mom. It’s a constant struggle and worrying is part of my life too.
I try to keep busy at work to keep my mind off those family issues.


#3

OMG!! I’m so with you on this. My family is going thru some tuff times, but it’s mostly financial. My wife and I love each other very much and our kids are thriving. Still, I worry constantly about our future and it makes feel guilty. I want to have trust in the Lord and I know he loves me and has brought me out of worse situations in the past. The thing is we didn’t have kids back then. Up until now, we never had any financial problems since our first child was born. I try to keep my mind focused on work and pray throughout the day, but lately I’ve been waking up about 4am and laying awake worrying. Then, I worry that God is gonna punish me and rightly so for worrying. UUgghh! The only thing that I can think of is he knows my struggles and forgives me.


#4

Sometimes I will wake up in the middle of the night and then have a hard time falling asleep thinking of my problems regarding my mother and making the right choices for her. It’s funny, I can fall asleep my normal time, but when I wake up in the middle of the night, it’s a different story. I really don’t feel that God is upset with this, as he understands our human feelings. Sometimes I’ll just say “Jesus, help me” “Jesus, Mary, I love you save Souls” for the Souls in Purgatory. Then when I finally get back to sleep, I am worse off in the a.m. with being overtired.


#5

Monica,

I try to remember:

Let nothing disturb you:

Let nothing disturb you.
Let nothing frighten you.
All things pass.
God does not change.
Patience achieves everything.
Whoever has God lacks nothing.
God alone suffices.

Christ has no body on earth now but yours;
no hands but yours;
no feet but yours.
Yours are the eyes
through which the compassion of Christ
must look out on the world.
Yours are the feet
with which he is to go about doing good.
Yours are the hands
with which he is to bless his people.

– St. Teresa of Avila

Serenity Prayer:

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I can not change
courage to change the things I can
and wisdom to know the difference.

– Unknown

I too worry. I have mild OCDlike symptoms. If you suspect that worry may be do to some sort of anxiety disorder you may want to seek counceling. Teresa of Avila does give some hope in her writings that “as one prays more and gets closer to God one worries less”. I myself am just praying and asking for “Gods will be done” and try to just let things go into his hands. I am not always successful, but I try. I think thats all he asks. :slight_smile:

– Cadian :knight1:


#6

Anxiety is useless. Turn with confidence to God.


#7

I too have suffered from great worry. Take some deep breaths. Pray to St. Dymphna, patron Saint of mental anguish. I have benefited from medication for my anxiety in addition to the added help of faith. You don’t have to struggle alone. God is always there with you, and you may find strength with similar minded friends or family. I would also like to offer myself as a resource if you would like. I will keep you in my prayers. God bless.


#8

Very true, but the person suffering from anxiety disorder and/or depression can’t just do that.

Often such a person needs medical help, but a good listener is always needed. People need to see HOW to make that turn toward confidence in God. Like I say, it is easy to tell someone “anxiety is useless” but I am afraid many, if not most, sufferers will say, “I have tried that. Now I just feel more guilt for not succeeding.”

Prayer does work, but until I got medical care for my depression I could not feel it.


#9

You’re not suppose to feel it. Reality isn’t about feeling. Reality is objective, absolute. God is Reality Itself. And that Reality is Love and Mercy.


#10

A perfect example of why platitudes are so unhelpful.

Betsy


#11

I’m right there with you. There is a lot of struggle going on with my family and I could worry about EVERYTHING, every aspect of life, the future, the past…

Still, making a morning offering helps. And when I feel especially burdened by my worries, and the fact that I even worry at all, I just offer that also, to Jesus. Give him everything you are, faults and all, and let Him work on your heart and mind.

(Dittos to the posters who mentioned also medication and/or counseling if necessary).

Will pray for you, God bless!


#12

A piece of practical advice:

Worry is one of the most popular “movies we play in our mind.” We recall our cares and concerns to mind incessently . . . and hope that through sheer repetition and brute force we might somehow bring clarity to the situation, alleviate our hurt and solve our problem. “What if . . . what if . . . what if” – it’s the very cancer of our mind that robs us of the peace we should seek. We don’t even think about how this happens, really . . . it just comes about naturally . . . part of our fallen nature. But “thinking” about what goes on in our mind and how we deal with our thoughts and emotions is the beginning of finding our way out.

More often than not, what we’re doing with our worry is *talking to ourselves *. . . when we need to be talking to God. Simple solution then: as soon as we recognize what we’re doing (and that’s the key) . . . turn off the monologue and start a dialogue. Through this act we don’t try and banish worry from our mind (for that too is brute force) . . . we simply turn it over to Him through the simple act of communication. And communication is the basis of relationship - which is what He wants above all with each of us. It’s easy, really, just talk to Him as you would any other person. And don’t just do this when you experience worry, fear or doubt . . . do it all the time. Until it becomes like breathing :slight_smile:

We’re human and we’ll always have cares and concerns . . . but all things being equal (i.e. absent a medical condition etc) we don’t have to let worry control us. IMO, and from my own experience, what I say shows us the way out of this trap we all face each and every day.

Peace,
Dave :slight_smile:


#13

“The easiest way to keep your peace of heart is to accept everything as coming directly from the hands of the God who loves you. If you do this, any pain or persecution, anything which is difficult to accept will be transformed into a source of joy, happiness, and peace…” Magnificat: October 2009; pg. 289.
Having cited this I hasten to say I agree with Harri Laaksonen’s thought. People suffering from an anxiety disorder, depression, or OCD may need to seek medical assistance while continuing in prayer, making every effort to adopt the kind of attitude exemplified in the above quote from Magnificat.


#14

great ideas everyone!! :slight_smile: thanks for sharing!

I also worry a lot about my family, the future, etc etc… it just gets so overwhelming sometimes!!
I think DBT made a great point about turning it from a monologue to a dialogue… whenever I turn my worries into prayers, that helps a lot, and I don’t feel so alone and helpless any more.

Also, I try to keep this in mind:

“Pray, hope, and don’t worry. Worry is useless. God is merciful and will hear your prayer” (St Padre Pio)

“Do not let any sadness to dwell in your heart, because this prevents the Holy Spirit from acting freely” (St Padre Pio - paraphrased a bit, cause I don’t remember it perfectly ;))

also there was this that someone on a forum (perhaps this one, sorry I forgot!) shared with me, and it really helped:

"The everlasting God has
in His wisdom foreseen
from eternity the cross
that He now presents to you
as a gift from His inmost heart.

This cross He now sends you
He has considered with His all-knowing eyes,
understood with His divine mind,
tested with His wise justice,
warmed with loving arms
and weighed with His own hands
to see that it be not one inch too large
and not one ounce too heavy for you.

He has blessed it with His holy Name,
anointed it with His consolation,
taken one last glance at you
and your courage,
and then sent it to you from heaven,

a special greeting from God to you,
an alms of the all-merciful love of God."

(St Francis de Sales)

and also what Jesus said to St Gemma Galgani:

"Jesus once said to me: “Do you know, daughter, for what reason I send crosses to souls dear to me? I desire to possess their souls, entirely, and for this I surround them with crosses, and I enclose them in sufferings and tribulation, that they may not escape from my hands; and for this I scatter thorns, that souls may fasten their affections upon no one, but find all content in Me alone. My daughter, if you do not feel the cross it cannot be called a cross. Be sure that under the cross you will not be lost. The demon has no strength against those souls who for My love groan under the cross. 0 My daughter, how many would have abandoned Me if they had not been crucified. The cross is a gift too precious, and from it come many virtues.”

I prayed then to Jesus that He would not concede to me any grace except that of loving Him very much, and Jesus said: “Oh soul dear to me, if you truly love Me, behold My chalice; you can drink it to the last drop. On this chalice I have placed My lips, and I want you to drink it.” I told Jesus to do with me as He would. And then He said to me: “I have sent this cross to you, you do not appreciate it; rather it is contrary to your desire, but the more it is contrary, the more it is like Mine. Would it not seem to you a dreadful thing to see a father in the midst of sorrow and the children enjoying themselves? When I shall be your Spouse of blood, I will come to you, but crucified; show your love to me as I have shown it toward you, and do you know how? By suffering, pains, and crosses without number. You ought, therefore, to consider yourself honored, if I lead you on paths hard and painful; if I permit that you be tormented by the demon, that the world despise you, that persons most dear to you afflict you, and with daily martyrdom, I permit your soul to be purified and tested. And you, daughter, think only of practicing great virtue; run in the path of the Divine Will, humbled, assured, that if I hold you to the cross, I love you.”


#15

sometimes when things get really tough I read over these quotes as well :slight_smile:

“In order to heal us, He does not remain outside the suffering that is experienced, He eases it by coming to dwell with the one stricken by illness, to bear it and to live with him. Christ’s presence comes to break the isolation which pain induces. Man no longer bears his burden alone. As a suffering member of Christ, he is conformed to Christ in his self-offering to the Father.”
Pope Benedict

"Nothing can so terrify us, as much as Jesus Christ can reassure us. Let my sins surround me, let my fears of the future accuse me, let the demons lay their snares for me. As long as I beg mercy of Jesus Christ, who is all kindness, who has loved me even until death, I cannot lose confidence; for I see myself so highly prized that a God gave Himself for me.
My Jesus, safe haven for those who seek you out in the storm; my vigilant shepherd, those who do not trust You are deceiving themselves, if only they have the will to amend their lives. That is why You said: Here I am, don’t be afraid: I am He who troubles and who consoles. Sometimes I put persons in scenes of desolation that seem like hell; but then I pull them out and console them. I am your advocate; I have made your cause My own. I am your guarantor; I have come to pay your debts. I am your Lord, who redeemed you with My blood, not to abandon you, but to enrich you, having ransomed you at a great price. How shall I flee from those who seek Me, when I went forth to meet those who sought to outrage Me? I did not turn away My face from those who struck Me; and shall I turn it from those who would adore Me? How can My children doubt that I love them, seeing Me in the hands of My enemies out of love for them? Whom have I ever despised that loved Me? Whom have I ever abandoned that sought my help? I go out in search even of those who do not seek Me."
John of Avila

"My daughter, know that if I allow you to feel and have a more profound knowledge of My sufferings, that is a grace from Me. But when your mind is dimmed and your sufferings are great, it is then that you take an active part in My Passion, and I am conforming you more fully to Myself. It is your task to submit yourself to My will at such time, more than at others… "
Jesus to St. Faustina


#16

:thumbsup:


#17

Hi, forgive me for not reading the last two long posts… but I read your first and I had this thought. When I get lost in thoughts about thoughts in my head, leading to anxious feelings or depressed feelings, … as soon as I am aware I am doing this, I call to mind cows in a field chewing and chewing… their own cud! In case you don’t know, cud is partially digested food. Yuck! Once I make the connection [each darn time] between my thoughts upon thoughts and cow cud, I am most happy to distract myself by going grocery shopping or paying the bills until my cud chewing mind settles down. Then, I thank the Lord for cows!
I mean this sincerely. I actually do this! Works for me.


#18

I was just thinking about another tip that helps me. When you worry about something, worry it all the way to the end. For example, what if my phone call sounded rude? Then, it is possible that it did. If my friend thinks so, she will tell me. Then, I can explain what I met and everything will be solved. It’s the getting stuck in the “what if” revolving that gets you! Good bless!


#19

i do struggle with worrying, but my problem is i worry that if i confide in god that he will make my what im worried about happen, :shrug: i know its silly and god wouldnt be mean and do that, but i have that thought stuck in my mind :shrug:


#20

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