Deciding on Chastity?

Hi all!

I may stir up some stuff when I say this, but this is for the single ladies. Has anyone else here decided to just live a single, chaste life and not even try to date?

I was married for 10 years, and have been divorced for 4, (annulment in process.) When I started dating again, I was literally in shock about the way things are now. People don’t seem to “date” any more. It’s more like a man will say, “Hey, why don’t you come over to my house?” There’s none of the getting-to-know-each other type dating I was used to. (Last time I dated was in the 90’s). Back then, you would meet a guy, go out on a few dates, and then if you liked each other, a relationship would ensue. Now it’s all about the so-called “Hook up” culture.

So, in response to this, I have decided to not date at all, and live chastely. Yes, it would be great to find someone one day, but I’m not counting on it. I’m in my thirties, and not thin and beautiful. I am curious as to whether any other ladies felt this way. :shrug:

I don’t think I count when it comes to dating, but yes, there are many out there that would rather stay single and chaste, and for various reasons. As for you, we never know what the Lord has in store for anyone. Peace and prayers for you.:thumbsup:

You are not alone. A lot of women feel the same.

Women can get a lot more social support without having to enter into a sexual relationship with someone.

A deep friendship among women would be looked at with a lot less suspicion than a deep friendship between men. I think this is unfortunate.

I have made a commitment to live chastely and not date. (I chose this for a spiritual reason and I don’t intend to marry). However, I see what you mean about the culture today. Maybe it would be different “dating” very devout Catholic men… (I know they’re not the majority though). Anyways, just wanted to say, you’re not the only one :slight_smile:

Yes, I have been praying for a good, strong Catholic man. I have found that living chastely gives me so much peace of mind. No unnecessary drama, or worrying about when a guy will call, if he’s seeing another woman, etc. It leaves me more time to focus on Our Lord. :gopray:

If you are called that vocation, it can be very holy and beautiful. It is natural to want to give up dating in this “sex-crazed” world.

Please note that there are devout, chaste Catholic men out there looking for devout, chaste women like you. I know they are difficult to find, but it is worth the search.

I found my wonderful husband on Catholic Match.

If you are serious about wanting to date a devout Catholic man, the fact that you do not have a decree of nullity is probably going to keep you out of their dating pool. Most good Catholic men won’t even start a relationship with a woman who isn’t free to marry in the Catholic Church – that’s part of what makes them a Good Catholic Man.

I am also a single woman. I’ve had the annulment for nine years. but I’ve only entered the “dating scene” in the past year. I only date men who are Catholic and free to marry in the Church. I haven’t had to deal with “let’s go to my place” at all, thanks be to God!

Even so, I have recently begun considering the possibility that God is asking me to remain single. Just listening at this point. We’ll see what God has planned.

God bless you!

Yeah, I’ve pretty much given up thinking of dating. I’m still in college, and it’s hard when so many of my peers are already on their third or fourth steady relationship. On the other hand, my life is pretty much my own, and it’s one less birthday I have to remember.

Very true. Thanks for that reminder!

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.