Please pray for me because I feel like with every passing day I get more anxiety and move closer to despair. So many things have been going wrong and I feel like lately my life has been one bit of bad news after another. I feel like I’m stressed to the max in every area of my life and I don’t know what to do. I try and be strong and pray but I just end up wanting to give up and just cry. I’m starting to wonder what’s the point of life because it seems like it’s one disappointment and bout of suffering after another.
I have felt the same way in the past. Remember that God never gives us more than we can handle. Turn your troubles over to Jesus. He wants us to. Talk to a close friend, family member, or parish Priest. They are all there to lend an ear. Prayer is a great anxiety relief for me. The Holy Rosary is wonderful for this.
Keep the Faith,
w2bp88 you are in my prayer
I will keep you in prayer.May our Lord Jesus fill you with His peace and give you blessed Hope.He is with you.He will “work it out”.He is worthy of our trust.Peace,Rocky.
Hang in there! Take it slowly, just one day at a time. As you go through this, God will just happen to show you things that will make your problems not seem as bad. I went through such a time for almost 2 years and I took it day by day. I longed for the night, for sleep, to help erase the pain. Then I would get up, pray, and look to get through the day. I would make it another day, and when I would get to a low point, God would let me know He was still with me. It is now many years later - I made it - you will too! God bless.
I’ve been there at times in my life, things endlessly going wrong and one disappointment after another, and loads of tears. I reckon I’ve a lake of tears ot there somewhere. I have a son who with much cause has been there too…so be sure that you are gently in my prayers.
Perhaps not in the exact same way, I have been to the depths of a faith crisis and wondering what God is up to as well. Let me share with you my story.
When I was going to graduate school, I was married and had three children (two in elementary school and one in diapers). And things began to spiral out of control. My wife got a new job, one that she liked and helped us income wise, but required her to put in 60-70 hour weeks. So I was the one with the flexibility in schedule and that put much of the household daily tasks upon me. We were in the beginning stages of getting our older two boys diagnosed with attention deficit disorder who were struggling in school and it was painful to get them to sit down and do their homework much less help them to learn to read when it was so hard for them. Then when my parents who were older were beginning to have health challenges (Dad going from emphysema to lung cancer to a brain tumor; mom in the early middle stage of Alzheimer’s) first my grandmother died so I had to make arrangements for her funeral and also take care of tying up loose financial ends for her. Then my wife and I were packing our three kids and our baggage along with ourselves into our Geo Metro to travel 175 miles each way to get to my parents’ home each weekend because they were having issues keeping things going and I was trying desperately to get power of attorney for finances and health care for them (all because my siblings who lived much closer felt they couldn’t handle all that and I could - even though I had never had experience with it either), then I had to put both parents in the nursing home against their will because they were not safe at home. Then after my dad died, we had to sell their house and spend down the assets in order to help my mom qualify for Medical Assistance so she could stay in the nursing home, which was a ton of paper work including making me representative payee for her social security and reporting each year for nine years on how her income was spent down to the penny and re-applying for her medical assistance each year. When the house was sold we had to clear it out of its contents and there was a lot of tension and undermining of my decisions by my siblings when they didn’t agree and tension in my marriage because my wife didn’t think I stood up to them enough. This so I was dreading Thanksgiving and Christmas each year because my side of the family made it a struggle each year about getting together not working far enough in advance to give us a chance to plan. All the runnning back and forth until my parents got into the nursing home cost me wages from a part time job while I was in school, time away from my studies, and money for each trip, to the point that our finances were strapped and hurting badly and my classes were suffering.
At the bottom of this I found myself in my kitchen, hands down on the table slouched with my head down crying “God, why did you let me come here to school so far away from my parents if you knew all of this was going to happen?” “What are you doing? I need help?” And my faith was so low, I began to wonder if I had any.
I asked one teacher, “What do you do if you are not sure you have faith?” He said very well, “If you are worrying about whether or not you have faith, you have it. Its the person who doesn’t care, who should worry.” That was a great relief to me.
That and a few more things. We did get support from a local church and from one we had never had an association with before who learned of our situation through mutual contacts and helped my family with a gift of money that got us through.
But even before that all came, I began to learn what it meant to pray Psalm 88.
If you read this Psalm it has no joy in it whatsoever. There is no statement at the end that says, “But Lord, I know you are faithful and you will come through.” Nothing of hope at all. Just a lament about the things that were going wrong and a wondering if God has abandoned the one who is writing it.
What that Psalm told me was that I wasn’t the first to feel that way and I won’t be the last. It also said, a person of faith will sometimes feel this way, as did the writer of the Psalm. And still the Psalm is a prayer, a sign of faith, yes, but also a sign that God is working in your life to draw you closer to him even as troubling things are happening all around you - reminding you that indeed as Scripture says, “God brings good out of all things.”
Continued in part II
You are in a thick fog right now, and you cannot see your way out. I and the others here who are praying for you are on the other side of that fog, not only praying for you, but also as evidence that there is light, the light of Christ on the outside of the fog. You will get through, eventually, though I cannot say when or how, but you will get through. But the only way is to simply put one foot in front of the other, and take it one day at a time, or one hour at a time if that is all you can handle, or less if necessary.
One of the other respondants above reminded us, “God never gives us more than we can handle.” The us there is right on. Its not a singular but a plural. We are not to try to do it all by ourselves, but together, so keep on leaning on us here and others, for prayer, for encouragement, and for whatever you are unable to do for yourself.
Then finally, if you don’t have a crucifix, get one, immediately! Hang it up in your house or apartment. Find one to wear too if you don’t have one. Let that be a sign to you and something for you to meditate upon often, especially when you are feeling overwhelmed. Let your meditation focus on all that Jesus went through for you and me. Let it remind you that the student (you and me) is not greater than the teacher (Jesus). If he suffered, we will too. It isn’t that God wills us to suffer. Rather suffering is a part of life, because of the presence of sin and death in the world (things God did not create but came because of the first rebellion by Satan, and later by our first parents Adam and Eve), and so you are not alone in your suffering, that through Christ God stands with you and promises to give you the strength to endure if you will let him (through his Word, through the Sacraments, and through prayer). And then let the redemptive suffering of Jesus remind you that our suffering is not without purpose here. The God who brings good out of all things will, if we let him, use our suffering to be a witness to the world of his power made perfect in our weakness. Others will be inspired to faith if they see our perseverence by his grace. They will say, “How do you do it?” And when you tell them, “It is by the grace of God that I keep going!” You will be a wonderful tool in God’s hands to bring others to the faith to become his children, citizens of the Kingdom of God. And if you need further encouragement, read about the lives of the saints. Discover that God sustained them in and through their suffering and loss, many times over, and realize that he will do the same for you if you let him do it in his way.
And if you meditate on all of this, and continue to seek his grace that he will surely give to you, then you will also move to seeing your suffering in light of the resurrection of Christ and the promise of everlasting life in heaven. You will be reminded like Father Corapi speaks of being reminded by his mother when he was feeling very down, when she said to him, “Why are you so downhearted? We know how the Bible ends! We win!” You will be reminded that the suffering of this life is not the end all and be all. You will be reminded that God’s power triumphs over everything because even if we should live to be 100 years old, the suffering of this finite life pales in comparison to the eternity we have to look forward to in heaven with Christ and all the children of God where there will be no more suffering, no more sorrow, no more loss, no more death! Then the words of the last verse of Amazing Grace will make sense, “When we’ve been there 10,000 years, bright shining as the sun, we’ll have no less days to sing God’s praise than when we’ve first begun!” This will give you great peace and joy, and your burden will become much lighter and your heart full. Then you will be able, even in the midst of your suffering to do as Jesus did, not to focus on your own suffering, but to focus on loving others and helping them to experience Christ and his love and grace. You will be helped to see clearer that nothing in this world can separate us from the love of Christ our Lord, unless we should turn our own back on him.
I know this is a lot to read. I’m sorry I’m so long winded. But I am living proof that you will get through the fog, one way or another. I am living proof that God will see you through all things. Just don’t try to go it alone. And don’t expect God’s answers to come in the form you think they should. Let your heart be open to whatever God will offer and seek to obey him in all things.
Without a doubt you are in my prayers.
Heavenly Father, you know the situation for W2BP88. You know the suffering, the sorrow, the disappointment, the struggle, the confusion, feelings of being overwhelmed and hopelessness. You sent your Son, who experienced all of these as he cried from the cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” You also raised him from death to prove your power over both the sins of all who nailed him to the cross (and who still add nails by their sins) and over death itself. Please I beg of you to be merciful to your servant W2BP88. Help W2BP88 see the many blessings you have given and thus to see your hand active and working great love and mercy. Open the heart of W2BP88 to receive the greater grace you are offering for the purpose of self-denial, picking up the cross, and following your Son Jesus Christ. Grant W2BP88 to persevere and not give up while being filled with your peace, joy, hope, love and anything else you see that is needed. Deepen the relationship you have with W2BP88 grant the grace necessary for being sustained in faith, hope, and love for all until Christ returns. Please grant this through Christ our Lord, who gave himself for us, so we may give ourselves to you for the sake of others. Amen.
Awesome witness, Steve. We’re privileged and blessed to have you amongst us.
I thank God for you.
Thank you all for your prayers and thank you Steve C for your post. Thank you for taking the time to write all that because I felt better after reading it. When I’m starting to feel bad, I’m going to read it again and take up your suggestions.
Steve, yeah I’m going to double on what Trishie said… incredible witness right there.
I’ll pray for you w2bp88
Thanks for your kinds words! I’m only glad I can help. We can pray for each other, as I am seeking help with clearing hurdles so I may convert. God bless you.
full of grace,
the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the Fruit Of Thy Womb,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.
I second that motion! Wow Steve with a story about inspiring I don’t mind doing the reading at all. I am struggling in graduate school right now and your story was very helpful to me as well.
Lord please help us all who are going through trials and tribulations and put people into our lives like Steve to help us see there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Finally we just want to thank you for all the people who are in our lives like Steve and others who are there to help us and encourage us when we are down and thank you for all the blessings you give us. Amen