I fear that my soul is damaged through the abusive relationship that existed between me and my husband. The Lord is working a miracle of transformation in me. But I don’t know what kind of help there is for a damaged soul. I fear it means that no matter what He does I am still in mortal peril. My son has suffered horribly in our marriage. My husband was an alcoholic with severe psoriasis and severe sleep apnea and a hysterical personality. I have been in treatment for emotional problems all my life and am working on forgiving my mother for her “Munchausen by proxy,” which means she sought unnecessary medical attention for me in order to get attention for her own problems. As a result, I spent a large part of my adult life on psychiatric wards seeking the perfect cure instead of learning to follow Jesus. Thank God, I am over that. I have a counselor now who also happens to be a Catholic.
For the last two years, since receiving an inheritance, my husband has gone wild. He has addressed his physical issues, including his need for a sexual partner, as I am no longer able to have sex. My son is desperate. I have filed for divorce–my husband is avoiding service of the divorce papers and involving my son in that (I live separately now.)
I pray that my husband learns forgiveness, as my mother’s inteference in our marriage from the beginning led to the destruction of both of us. I don’t think there is any hope for our marriage. Please pray for my son. He has suffered in this situation all his life, and it is most of all having to stand by and watch as he suffered that damaged me so badly, also the physical damage from the sexuality because my husband and I never got to know each other right and I was already fragile.
Thank you for your prayers.