Condoms do desensitize the friction and bonding, if used frequently. Also, it seems that if one chooses not to use birth control (man made), and opts for natural planning, sex is seen as extremely powerful (spiritually, emotional, physically) and isn’t abused as much. Sex isn’t just sex; it isn’t merely reduced to an animalistic activity; it isn’t just seen as “something natural - so it’s totally okay.” Selective engagements and restraint makes sex much more meaningful and better - as cliche that may sound.
One audience member questioned Fagan on the “danger” of selling the idea that Catholics were guaranteed better sex if they waited for marriage. But Fagan said it was clear “those who are monogamous have the best sex they ever could – because its the only sex they’ll ever know.”
I think Fagan stumbles due to faulty logic. I think he is reducing sex, and therefore rationalizing it, as just a pleasure seeking game - that using one “lover” (in quotes because the label “lover” is hugely misused … it’s more like sex partner) after another is a must for sexual enrichment and “knowing what you like and don’t like.” It ain’t like food in that sense. I’m always baffled when people use the “well, you’re monogamous … you haven’t experienced others, so get out there and get laid!” card
Unless your husband or wife is not “adventurous” in bed, then that can be a serious problem - but that kinda comes with any sex partner. What one can do with numerous sex partners, one can do with just one. The only thing is the one person you choose to marry must act as the “numerous sex partner.”
Instead of reducing sex to a game of pleasure, and the “the more the merrier” or the “more partners the better sex” or even “life’s a buffet, might as well try everything you can,” I see it like running a play for a basketball team. You have one team and you run a certain play. You can also run different plays with that same team - you don’t have to coach another team to experience a different play. You can play zone or man-to-man; you can pick-and-roll or play iso.