After struggling for many years in an unhappy marriage, I had my eyes opened by my MIL. She knows it, and although I had been in denial for years, my DH is an alcoholic. Right now, I’m trying to take things one day at a time, looking into Al-Anon meetings, and putting myself first (strangely, hard for me to do).
DH hasn’t been told that he’s an alcoholic, but I think he knows. My MIL has said that she’d like to break the news to him, as her husband was an alcoholic, and she could explain the similarities between her relationship with her husband and ours. I have written (not given yet) a letter to my DH as well as an explanation of my feelings as of late ie.: I feel xxx because xxx. All we have to do now is wait for a good opportunity (sober) to tell him.
Although I believe I’m taking some good first steps, I’d appreciate additional advice about how to go about this. How should I act around DH when he’s drinking? How do I break the news to my mother? Is it OK for me to tell acquaintances that he has a problem to lessen my embarrassment when he’s drunk around them? Must I remain in an emotionally dead & abusive relationship or are annulments allowable in this case? I never imagined I’d consider such a thing, but I fear my children’s and my own well being. While he has never hurt me physically, I live in fear that he will someday… I don’t want my children to grow up thinking it’s okay to control people and treat them like garbage.
Any thoughts, advice or prayers are welcomed.