Did I invalidate my confession? Intention Question


Hello all! I’ve got a concern about a confession I made recently…I had left the church for a while and recently came back. I made a general confession and, after careful examination of conscience, said every sin and possible sin I could ever remember committing. I also went in with a few questions on if certain things were sins or not. So here’s what I’m concerned with. It’s kind of long, I apologize in advance.

My BF and I are in a long distance relationship, and have been together a while. Every night I text him “Goodnight, I love you with all my heart”. But we have been in a rough patch lately. There are some days I do love him with all my heart, and other days where it’s just kinda tough. He’s aware of this as well, but I still say it every night. One night as I was typing it I started wondering “am I lying everyday?” Now I’ve been undergoing alot of personal stress as well and it has been overflowing onto the relationship so I think alot of the hesitation comes from that (and the distance) but I wanted to check with the priest to see if he thought I was sinning daily. So I went to confession, and towards the end explained it all. At one point I said something like “If I stop saying it, our relationship will be in jeopardy”. Ultimately the priest told me it’s normal to have bad spells in relationships and that I wasn’t lying/sinning.

Now fast forward to after the confession. I started playing the confession over in my head. I know that going to confession and saying a sin you have no intent to stop is sacrilegious and invalidates the whole thing. So now I am HIGHLY concerned that I have done that…I don’t explicitly remember thinking to myself “Well if it’s a sin I’m going to continue it anyway”, but I also don’t remember thinking “If it’s a sin, I will change what I say”. And now I’m second guessing myself especially after I said the “If I stop saying it…” bit. I think I went in with an open mind and neutral thought on it and just wanted advice on if it was a sin or not. But again, now I’m second guessing myself and my intent, and am wondering if I invalidated the whole thing, or I’m waaaaaay overthinking this.

Thank you for taking the time to read all of this. Hopefully I explained it well enough. I can’t think clearly on it and would love some outside advice!


Yes you are way overthinking it. To say “I love you” doesn’t mean that every minute or every day you love everything about the other person. I can honestly say I love you to my wife even though I don’t like the way she acted or what she said at one time or another.

If you really don’t love the person but say it anyway, and really know it is a sin and do it anyway and say God, I know it’s wrong and I’m going to do it anyway, we’ll… that’s a different story.


Thank you for your reply. My gut told me it wasn’t a sin, mostly due to how much my stress is effecting my clarity on things right now. But I still felt I needed to ask the priest.

My main concern in this matter, however, is whether or not I went to confession with the intention to continue saying it if it indeed was a sin. Because if I did, then that is sacrilege and invalidates the whole thing :frowning:


What you described seems TO ME {my opinion] is not to be a MORTAL sin as it seems to not be what the church MIGHT consider to be a "serious matter:

Discuss it the next time you get to Confession; and if its REALLY bothering YOU get to Confessions ASAP


Yeah, that…


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