Discerning a crush during Lent


Hi all,

First, for background’s sake, it would be good to tell you that I am, after 2 years of study, being received into the Church this Easter. It’s a very exciting time for me and the culmination of a lot of sacrifice and growth. I’m coming from a very fundamentalist group, the churches of Christ. That being said, I’ve never heard of discernment as a way to learn God’s will until almost a year ago. My relationship with God previous to my conversion process was more of a dutiful, detached, un-emotional “relationship.” I learned that I hadn’t actually met Jesus until seeing the Mass for the first time. So, I’m still learning about this process of discernment.

Anyway, I’m obviously very busy this Lent. I’m focused on coming into the Church at Easter. Also, God has granted me the opportunity to visit Israel during Lent, which I am so thankful for. But in the midst of all this, I have been struck with something that has left me a little lost. I’ve found myself to be interested in a girl who is a sponsor for another girl in our RCIA group. I’ve talked with some of my friends about this (one who has long been single, another who was in seminary but learned his vocation was marriage and is soon to be married) and they both affirmed my decision to not pursue this attraction at the moment, but focus on Easter and discern this attraction during Lent.

Here’s the gist of this post: has anyone ever found themselves in this type of situation? Finding a very alluring path to take while currently being on a path that needs full attention? I’m just hoping to hear some advice from anyone who would have any, especially in relation to discerning this attraction.


I don’t think both paths are mutually exclusive. You can still focus the majority of your attention to lent and the Church but you can also explore other paths. This could all be part of your overall discernment.

I’m married with young kids and I can assure you that as much as I would like to focus the majority of my time on this penitential season (or the RCIA process for you) other commitments like my vocation to my family will always have a major role. I do not see anything wrong with that as there needs to be balance.

I wish you all the best on your journey!

Oh, and Welcome Home!




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