It was suggested I post here vs. Prayer Intentions…
I’m posting in the search for advice or any possible guidance on discernment, particularly discerning adoption. Perhaps I can clarify, while simultaneously broadening the focus a bit. How does one discern an important life path/decision such as adoption (or others!), when there’s the specific muddling from an extremely high human emotional state? Discerning the adoption of an infant, after a couple has not conceived themselves for multiple years, could easily be muddled by “human baby fever”, in my opinion. Or am I overthinking this?
More backstory… My wife and I have been married just over 3 years now. The 1st year we were of course open to life, but “focused on our marriage” and other new personal life changes/events. We practiced NFP. Then starting Year 2, we began more actively TTC. So it’s now been 2 years of TTC, but no result yet. Testing and doctor visits later, we’ve discovered zero medical reason for infertility. I personally feel in my heart of hearts that our time will come and God will make it happen. There’s no medical reason for lacking a positive conception, but perhaps logical ones, tying into our potential lack in the degree of TTC. There’s been lots of stress and roadblocks in the last 2 years, both marital and external. I’ll leave it at that for now. I don’t personally see any reason why we can’t conceive, ourselves, naturally.
I apologize for this now lengthier post. I wish to be thorough before comments arise though… Fast forward to a week ago, when my wife calls me multiple times from work and I answer, hoping everything is okay. Turns out she’s ecstatic and saying “we have a baby.” She’s very excited about this opportunity that just came up where a coworker has a 16 y-o daughter who has become pregnant very unexpectedly. The family instantly thought of us apparently, and although this is very sudden and nothing is inked or plans set in stone, this is certainly an opportunity, if we should discern it our path. My wife seems much more impulsively running down this yellow brick road pathway, but I am more cautious and find it very necessary to pray for some time (hopefully together) and properly discern.
How do we discern this situation/opportunity, being able to decipher through human “emotionality”, “baby fever”, and deep urges, to God’s will and a desire that comes from Him?
For myself, I feel the greatest thing I struggle with is the “changing of Plans”. Our plan has always been one thing, so is it really wrong that this opportunity would most certainly change our plans immensely? I need to clarify that we are very open to life and very pro/open to adoption by all means. We’ve discussed this openness to adoption back when we were dating. I myself, am one of multiple adopted siblings even. I think I have a fear that if we “take” this opportunity, my wife will then want to go back to NFP and not actively TTC again for a couple years, because of this “guaranteed baby” and preferring not two infants at once.
Thank you to anyone who did read this lengthy post. And I appreciate any and all advice, pointers to resources, prayers, etc.